Quote

It is only when we begin to relax with ourselves that meditation becomes a transformative process. Only when we relate with ourselves without moralizing, without harshness, without deception, can we let go of harmful patterns. Without maitri (metta), renunciation of old habits becomes abusive. This is an important point.

Pema Chodron

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Pema Chodron
Age: 88
Born: 1936
Born: July 14
Clergyman
Philosopher
Writer
New York City
New York
Deirdre Blomfield-Brow
Habit
Harmful
Becomes
Deception
Point
Habits
Process
Relax
Moralizing
Without
Relate
Harshness
Important
Patterns
Transformative
Begin
Abusive
Meditation
Renunciation

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I equate ego with trying to figure everything out instead of going with the flow. That closes your heart and your mind to the person or situation that's right in front of you, and you miss so much.
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The truth you believe and cling to makes you unavailable to hear anything new.
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We hold on to hope, and hope robs us of the present moment.
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In the end, that's what we all need more than anything else: to be there for each other, in every kind of situation.
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We can let the circumstances of our lives harden us so that we become increasingly resentful and afraid, or we can let them soften us and make us kinder and more open to what scares us. We always have this choice.
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Compassion practice is daring. It involves learning to relax and allowing ourselves to move gently toward what scares us.
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Buddhism itself is all about empowering yourself, not about getting what you want.
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There are many changes in the weather of a day.
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People get into a heavy-duty sin and guilt trip, feeling that if things are going wrong, that means that they did something bad and they are being punished. That's not the idea at all.
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Trying to change ourselves doesn't work in the long run because we're resisting our own energy. Self-improvemen t can have temporary results, but lasting transformation occurs only when we honor ourselves as the source of wisdom and compassion.
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All situations teach you, and often it's the tough ones that teach you best.
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When things are shaky and nothing is working, we might realize that we are on the verge of something. We might realize that this is a very vulnerable and tender place, and that tenderness can go either way. We can shut down and feel resentful or we can touch in on that throbbing quality. (9)
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Right down there in the thick of things, we discover the love that will not die.
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It's not a terrible thing that we feel fear when faced with the unknown. It is a part of being alive, something we all share. We react against the possibility of loneliness, of death, of not having anything to hold on to. Fear is a natural reaction to moving closer to the truth.
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How will we experience the world a month, a year, or five years from now? Will we be even angrier, more grasping and fearful, or will some shift have occurred? This depends entirely on the tendencies we reinforce today.
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What you do for yourself, you're doing for others, and what you do for others, you're doing for yourself.
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Although we have the potential to experience the freedom of a butterfly, we mysteriously prefer the small and fearful cocoon of ego.
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When you begin to touch your heart or let your heart be touched, you begin to discover that it's bottomless.
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Ego is like a room of your own, a room with a view with the temperature and the smells and the music that you like. You want it your own way. You'd just like to have a little peace, you'd like to have a little happiness, you know, just gimme a break.
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The approach is that the best way to use unwanted circumstances on the path of enlightenment is not to resist but to lean into them.
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