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Please stop looking at me, she thought, afraid of his eyes and terrified of her own heart.

Paullina Simons

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Paullina Simons
Age: 61
Born: 1963
Born: January 1
Translator
Writer
St. Petersburg
Looking
Eye
Thought
Heart
Terrified
Afraid
Please
Stop
Eyes

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Love is, to be loved,” said Alexander, “in return.
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Good-bye, my moonsong and my breath, my white nights and golden days, my fresh water and my fire. Good-bye, and may you find a better life, find comfort again and your breathless smile, and when your beloved face lights up once more at the Western sunrise, be sure what I felt for you was not in vain. Good-bye and have faith, my Tatiana.
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Daughters are supposed to be friends to their mothers in their old age.
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And then, because she was Tatiana and because she couldn’t help herself, and because he wouldn’t have it any other way, she ran to him and was in his arms.
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He stared at her fists and at her face and said with upset incredulity, You promised me you would forgive me- Forgive you,Tatiana hissed through her teeth, tears streaming down her face, for your brave and indifferent face, Alexander! She groaned in pain. Not for your brave and indifferent heart.
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Love is when he is hungry and you feed him. Love is knowing when he is hungry.
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This is days and days and months and years and all the minutes in between, just you me.
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When I was growing up, 'Anna Karenina' was one of my favourite books.
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Courage, Alexander..... Courage, Tatiana
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I was blinded by stupidity for a brief moment in our life, for a flicker in the eternity in which you and I live, and I stumbled.
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In Alexander's life there was one thread that could not be broken by death, by distance, by time, by war. Could not be broken. As long as I am in the world, she said with her breath and her body, as long as I am, you are permanent, soldier.
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With my writing, because I live it, I have to be consumed by it, and that means you have to forget your other life, which is constantly pulling you from your work.
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Memory - that fiend, that cruel enemy of comfort.
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And that's my point: all great things worth having require great sacrifice worth giving.
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Dear God, Tatiana prayed in bed that night, turning to the wall and pulling the white sheet and the thin brown blanket over herself. If You are there somewhere, please teach me how to hide what I never knew how to show.
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I'll take your breath any way you give it to me, Shura.
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You have amazing gifts. Don't squander them. Don't give them out meaninglessly, don't abuse them, don't take them for granted. You are the weapon you carry with you till the day you die. -Tatiana and Alexander
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Tatiana realized she was too young to hide well what was in her heart but old enough to know that her heart was in her eyes.
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But on that sunlit Sunday, Alexander knew nothing, thought nothing, imagined nothing. He forgot Dimitri and war and the Soviet Union and escape plans, and even America, and crossed the street for Tatiana Metanova.
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When Tatiana looked up from her ice cream, she saw a soldier staring at her from across the street.
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