Quote

Gay Republicans, how exactly does that work? 'We disapprove of our own lifestyle. We beat ourselves up in parking lots.

Paula Poundstone

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Paula Poundstone
Age: 64
Born: 1959
Born: December 29
Actor
Author
Comedian
Pundit
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Huntsville
Alabama
Gay
Beats
Exactly
Disapprove
Republican
Parking
Doe
Republicans
Work
Lifestyle
Lots
Beat

More quotes by Paula Poundstone

Image
I hate it when my hair is engaged in unauthorized activities.
Paula Poundstone
Image
President Obama could keep a big map with push pins on it to keep track of how many countries hate us, and when we get down to only half, let's have a ball. I'll blow up the balloons myself.
Paula Poundstone
Image
I get the first flight out from anywhere I am because I have to come home to my kids.
Paula Poundstone
Image
The truth is libraries are raucous clubhouses for free speech, controversy and community.
Paula Poundstone
Image
I was the youngest in my family. When the other kids went to school, my mother would make them breakfast and then she would go back to bed for an hour, so I was sort of babysat by television.
Paula Poundstone
Image
I confess that when I first read that smog is particularly hazardous to children, senior citizens, and physically active people, for a brief moment I thought, “I’m in the clear for at least 10 more years.”
Paula Poundstone
Image
I love talking to the audience, and I must be the luckiest performer in the world. I always land something or somebody that just takes off.
Paula Poundstone
Image
I did auditions at a club called the Comedy Connection. They wanted nothing to do with me. But one night they were doing a night of all women comics, and they invited me to do that.
Paula Poundstone
Image
I know a little bit about handicapping. If the horse has an IV, you want to stay - away from it.
Paula Poundstone
Image
There are really only so many foods and so many ways you can prepare them.
Paula Poundstone
Image
I love key lime pie, although it's never made the proper way.
Paula Poundstone
Image
I think we need a 12-step group for non-stop talkers. We're going to call it On and On Anon.
Paula Poundstone
Image
I'll probably never have children because I don't believe in touching people for any reason.
Paula Poundstone
Image
My parents got carried away with the letter P when they were naming the kids in our family. There's me, Paula, my sisters Peggy and Patty, and my brother Pjimmy, spelled with a silent P.
Paula Poundstone
Image
I don't need a holiday or a feast to feel grateful for my children, the sun, the moon, the roof over my head, music, and laughter, but I like to take this time to take the path of thanks less traveled.
Paula Poundstone
Image
I used to watch 'The Waltons' and sob because my family was nothing like that. We had a cruel sense of humor in my family.
Paula Poundstone
Image
The pleasure of the mulch pile is incomprehensible. I wouldn't care if they just hauled the mulch to the landfill somewhere. Obviously, grass clippings are biodegradable, but when they're bunched together at the landfill, they become badly influenced by other garbage.
Paula Poundstone
Image
I made mistakes and I broke the law and I'm more than willing to pay a price for that. But there's a price beyond that that my children have paid, and that's not what was supposed to happen.
Paula Poundstone
Image
I talk to a lot of librarians, and there's always a steady drumbeat of how libraries are places of community. But a lot of them have also recently - and just in the nick of time - refurbished, because during this economic downturn, people have a tendency to borrow instead of buy.
Paula Poundstone
Image
When we live up to our Constitution, let's form a Conga line around the Capitol and bungee jump off the dome.
Paula Poundstone