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My act is sort of improvisational. I have a skeleton in my head, but no fat or skin on it.

Paula Poundstone

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Paula Poundstone
Age: 64
Born: 1959
Born: December 29
Actor
Author
Comedian
Pundit
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Huntsville
Alabama
Fats
Skin
Skins
Head
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Skeleton
Skeletons

More quotes by Paula Poundstone

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What moron said that knowledge is power? Knowledge is power only if it doesn't depress you so much that it leaves you in an immobile heap at the end of your bed.
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I get in fewer arguments when I'm alone.
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I've decided that perhaps I'm bulimic and just keep forgetting to purge.
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I get the first flight out from anywhere I am because I have to come home to my kids.
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I know a little bit about handicapping. If the horse has an IV, you want to stay - away from it.
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When we save the rain forest, the polar bear, and Al Gore, we should party so hard that Canada calls the cops on us for noise.
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When we live up to our Constitution, let's form a Conga line around the Capitol and bungee jump off the dome.
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I love talking to the audience, and I must be the luckiest performer in the world. I always land something or somebody that just takes off.
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I'll probably never have children because I don't believe in touching people for any reason.
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The wages of sin are death, but by the time taxes are taken out, it's just sort of a tired feeling.
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It is the best part of the night. The classic interactive lines are 'Where are you from? What do you do for a living?' I almost always get something interesting.
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I did auditions at a club called the Comedy Connection. They wanted nothing to do with me. But one night they were doing a night of all women comics, and they invited me to do that.
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I think we need a 12-step group for non-stop talkers. We're going to call it On and On Anon.
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The truth is libraries are raucous clubhouses for free speech, controversy and community.
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I have a horrible memory and I used to consider that a liability, but I've learned along the way that talking to people is really a beautiful thing.
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I love key lime pie, although it's never made the proper way.
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Adults are always asking little kids what they want to be when they grow up because they're looking for ideas
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I'm the only person I know of who's ever been pulled over for attempted speeding.
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Once I was gone for a month and I was just miserable, so I flew back from Florida for two hours just to be home and see my cats.
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I used to work at The International House of Pancakes. It was a dream, and I made it happen.
Paula Poundstone