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My wife and I never agree on the dishtowels. It's a matter of terms. She asks me not to put the dishtowel in the sink. So I drape it over the sink, but not in the sink. If that's our biggest problem, I think we're in good shape.
Paul Reiser
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Paul Reiser
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: March 30
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Essayist
Film Actor
Film Producer
Pianist
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Writer
New York City
New York
Good
Shapes
Never
Agree
Think
Terms
Thinking
Wife
Drape
Asks
Drapes
Term
Sink
Problem
Shape
Matter
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More quotes by Paul Reiser
The most used appliance in our house is my 10-year-old son Leon's Xbox.
Paul Reiser
The consumer mentality - we like something, what other flavor does it come in? We like that TV show, does it come in a book form? Does it come in a capsule? How about a soup?
Paul Reiser
As you get older you realize your parents don't look so dumb - and that you're not as smart as you thought you were.
Paul Reiser
It was trying to make my tennis game look mildly respectable, which I found you don't even really need to practice if you have a really good editor. They can edit it and you're like, Hey, it looks like I'm playing really well. That was the fun part, but it was like going to summer camp.
Paul Reiser
In traditional TV, it's very hard to have the luxury of banking all your scripts and getting everything in a row, but it does make it very easy, and it's very productive and beneficial and you learn as you're going.
Paul Reiser
I'm not smart enough to write about something that didn't actually happen to me. But I couldn't write a space movie if you put a gun to my head.
Paul Reiser
There's something that happens in that delivery room, when a woman becomes ten times more a woman, and a guy becomes six times less a man. You feel really dopey and useless and like a spectator. I did, anyway.
Paul Reiser
Younger kids, they understand that things aren't so perfect with their father or with their mother.
Paul Reiser
I used to walk into a party and scan the room for attractive women. Now I look for women to hold my baby so I can eat potato salad sitting down.
Paul Reiser
Field of Dreams is the only movie - and I saw it in the theater - on an afternoon when I was on location somewhere, and there were like 12 people in the theater. I was just so devastated I couldn't get out of my seat. And I sat and watched it a second time.
Paul Reiser
There's something very refreshing about being on stage.
Paul Reiser
If a tree falls on your head in a forest and no one hears it, it still hurts.
Paul Reiser
Get a good dog. We have not picked up food in the kitchen in 15 years.
Paul Reiser
In the history of life, no good news has followed that sentence [We have to talk.].
Paul Reiser
Two or three times a week, I drive by the houses of numbers 78-100 just to rub it in.
Paul Reiser
A friend told me to listen to my heart. Another friend told me to listen to my gut. Maybe I need an autopsy, because right now my colon is kind of iffy.
Paul Reiser
Having a baby dragged me, kicking and screaming, from the world of self-absorption.
Paul Reiser
The jewel in the baby product crown is the stroller. And if in America you are what you drive, then in Parentland, you are what you push.
Paul Reiser
Upstate New York in the middle of October. You can't get more beautiful than that.
Paul Reiser
By shrewdly linking procreation to an act likely to make you stupid with excitement, God has seen to it that Life does indeed go on. It's possible, by the way, that this is why God's name comes up so often in the middle of the act it's a salute to the author: Hey, whoever made this up - thanks.
Paul Reiser