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People ask me, when was my best time? I always say, 'Today.'

Paul Mooney

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Paul Mooney
Age: 79 †
Born: 1941
Born: August 4
Died: 2021
Died: May 19
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Producer
Shreveport
Louisiana
Paul Gladney
Asks
Today
Best
Always
Time
People

More quotes by Paul Mooney

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People in America worship money, and a white man's face on a green piece of paper does not make me wealthy. My health makes me wealthy. I used to work at a hospital, so I know the real deal.
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You know who you are. If my mother is a nun and someone comes up to me and they go, 'Your mother is a prostitute.' It is not going to bother me, because I know my mother is a nun, she's not a prostitute.
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The king of comedy is dead. Richard Pryor was the king of comedy. The rest of them are the king of copycats.
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The political arena is the funniest.They [politicians] are always pretending to change, but they never change. They're the best actors and actresses in the world. They've always been hilarious since the beginning of time.
Paul Mooney
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I don't want affirmative action - too much affirmative, not enough action.
Paul Mooney
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My comedy is a nuclear bomb inside my mind. It's a weapon that's never been tested. It just blows up and flattens everybody.
Paul Mooney
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Whatever that thing is that white people like in blacks, I don't have it. Maybe it's my arrogance or my self-assurance or the way I carry myself, but whatever it is, I don't have it.
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A woman can tell me about her having a baby, but I'll never know what it is to have a baby.
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There's no such thing as reverse racism.
Paul Mooney
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What does America love more than one white male?
Paul Mooney
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If your hair is relaxed, white people are relaxed. If your hair is nappy, they're not happy.
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White people are very good at acting like they're not racist. They deserve an Academy Award for that.
Paul Mooney
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You can't pick when you're touched. You can't pick the time. It just is. It's the reality. What it is, is. I can't change the past. I can only deal with the present and the future.
Paul Mooney
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White people made up the n-word, they knew about racial jokes before anybody, and in their old movies and old cartoons they made fun of everybody, especially black folks. Racial jokes were not new to them.
Paul Mooney
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Hollywood doesn't even have respect for itself. Hollywood lies to itself.
Paul Mooney
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I like when people are trapped in the joke, when there's no escape. I like to lead people down the wrong path and then trap them.
Paul Mooney
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A goat's a goat. Whether you sauté or barbeque it, it's still a goat.
Paul Mooney
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You white folks see UFOs in your dreams. You don't hear about Martians in Harlem.
Paul Mooney
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Hillary Clinton could say she was a woman and running for president. And Sarah Palin could say she was a woman and running for vice-president. But Obama couldn't say, 'I'm black and I'm running for president.' It couldn't come out of his mouth. He couldn't say that because, if he did, he'd lose votes.
Paul Mooney
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I've never seen anyone more messed up over success than Richard Pryor. For him, it's a constant battle between success in the white world and keeping it real for his black self.
Paul Mooney