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It wasn't until I went to college and met different people from different areas of life - and then went to San Francisco and met people who really knew who the hell they were - that I kind of caught up in a hurry.

Patton Oswalt

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Patton Oswalt
Age: 55
Born: 1969
Born: January 27
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Writer
Portsmouth
Virginia
Patton Peter Oswalt
Patton P. Oswalt
Went
Francisco
Knew
Hurry
Different
Mets
Kind
Caught
Really
Areas
Life
College
People
Wasn
Hell

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Anything's better than Gen X which is what we got. Thanks Douglas Coupland. We sound like a team of mutant vigalantees with frosted hair and chain wallets. Actually that's not completely horrible.
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I think right now is the best time for stand-up, ever. I sincerely do.
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Cheap liquor is a magic potion that can turn you into a puppet cowboy before it kills you.
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Everything we have today that's cool comes from someone wanting more of something they loved in the past. Action figures, videogames, superhero movies, iPods: All are continuations of a love that wanted more.
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If you actually do cold readings, it's very close to how people actually talk, because you're experiencing these thoughts anew every moment, and trying to make them come out coherently.
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I mean, the death in the late eighties and early nineties really shook out a lot of hacks. The pond just sort of dried up for a lot of really bad comedians.
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I have to drink this much to be as unfunny as you.
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I think the kind of person that gravitates toward New York is a person that's not so much focused on controlling exactly how they appear and how they exit. They're more fascinated with the process.
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Somebody is going to find a way digitally that is just as innovative. In the end, the tools can change, but there is always someone who can think of something cool to do.
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You can be an amateur and have a passion for something, but it takes a long time to actually become a professional, meaning that you can handle any situation.
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If you hit a midget on the head with a stick, he turns into 40 gold coins.
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Knowing comedy is knowing human nature.
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I've hung out in the writer's room a few times, but the fact is we've got such a good writing staff, I don't want to get my peanut butter fingerprints on anything.
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Stand-up is something I just truly love to do, so I'll always go back to it. I'll never stop doing it, that's for sure.
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Meal isn't over when I'm full. Meal's over when I hate myself.
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I love the beginning of Magnolia, the thing about the dealer. That scene is genius. Brilliantly acted.
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One of my groupies gave me a film that they made, and it ended up being amazing, so I got it shown at South by Southwest. If I can help get their stuff out there, then great.
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People will find transformation and transcendence in a McDonald's hash brown if it's all they've got.
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I'm still very much an atheist, except that I don't necessarily see religion as being a bad thing. So, that's a weird thing that I'm struggling with that seems to be offending both atheists and people that are religious.
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We would not be here if humanity were inherently evil. We'd have eaten ourselves alive long ago.
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