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I'd learned some things. I knew you weren't supposed to hold a good wine at the top - the paper bag falls off.

Pat Paulsen

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Pat Paulsen
Age: 69 †
Born: 1927
Born: July 6
Died: 1997
Died: April 24
Actor
Comedian
South Bend
Washington
Patrick Layton Paulsen
Hold
Learned
Knew
Bags
Fall
Falls
Good
Weren
Things
Supposed
Wine
Paper

More quotes by Pat Paulsen

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We've got to step up our conservation efforts before it's too late. We're not protecting our lands and natural resources. Take the Grand Canyon for example I'm sure that at one time it was a beautiful piece of land, and just look at the way we've let it go.
Pat Paulsen
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The federal government spends millions to run the Postal Service. I could lose your mail for half of that.
Pat Paulsen
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The No. 1 cause of forest fires is trees.
Pat Paulsen
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People come up to me in bars and on street corners and they say to me, 'Hey, Paulsen, have you got any change?'
Pat Paulsen
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I admit I do have some drawbacks and limitations as a candidate. Although I am a professional comedian, some of my critics maintain that this is not enough. I cannot deny that I stand before you untested and inexperienced - I only spent two years in television, never as a romantic lead or a song and dance man.
Pat Paulsen
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I've upped my standards. Now, up yours.
Pat Paulsen
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Only a cheap politician, greedy for political gain, would try to single out one individual for blame. The fault lies not with the individual but with the system, and that system is Richard Nixon.
Pat Paulsen
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Wine is something to enjoy. We get sick and tired of people who pick it apart and talk about its 'saucy nuances.'
Pat Paulsen
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Every child has a right to go to high school and end up with a third grade education.
Pat Paulsen
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Deep down, I happen to be very shallow.
Pat Paulsen
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Marijuana should be licensed and kept out of the hands of teenagers. It's too good for them.
Pat Paulsen
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Having a comic in the White House will assure stability in foreign relations. The world will continue to respond to foreign initiatives by saying, 'You must be joking.'
Pat Paulsen
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Sex doesn't have to be taught. It's something most of us are born with.
Pat Paulsen
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You have to understand, I can't do any jokes about Ross Perot, because the last thing I need right now is another credit check.
Pat Paulsen
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I came down to Orange because I sold the Smothers Brothers a song called 'Chocolate,' and that gave me enough money to move down here. I was washing windows down in Orange County when they called me up and said they wanted me to do their TV show.
Pat Paulsen
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I want to caucus in Iowa. I'll caucus all over the state. I don't caucus in California. You don't caucus where you live. It doesn't look good.
Pat Paulsen
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Why should we tell kidnappers, murderers, and embezzlers their rights? If they don't know their rights, they shouldn't be in the business.
Pat Paulsen
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Censorship does not interfere with the constitutional rights of every American to sit alone in a dark room in the nude and cuss.
Pat Paulsen
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As I've always said: The future lies ahead.
Pat Paulsen
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I am neither left wing nor right wing. I am middle-of-the-bird.
Pat Paulsen