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The federal government spends millions to run the Postal Service. I could lose your mail for half of that.

Pat Paulsen

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Pat Paulsen
Age: 69 †
Born: 1927
Born: July 6
Died: 1997
Died: April 24
Actor
Comedian
South Bend
Washington
Patrick Layton Paulsen
Government
Mail
Federal
Service
Lose
Loses
Millions
Half
Postal
Running
Spends

More quotes by Pat Paulsen

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I'd learned some things. I knew you weren't supposed to hold a good wine at the top - the paper bag falls off.
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I want to caucus in Iowa. I'll caucus all over the state. I don't caucus in California. You don't caucus where you live. It doesn't look good.
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I've upped my standards. Now, up yours.
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We have nothing to fear but fear itself...and of course the boogieman.
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As I've always said: The future lies ahead.
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I admit I do have some drawbacks and limitations as a candidate. Although I am a professional comedian, some of my critics maintain that this is not enough. I cannot deny that I stand before you untested and inexperienced - I only spent two years in television, never as a romantic lead or a song and dance man.
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Presidents tend to tinker, you know, and mess everything up.
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Marijuana should be licensed and kept out of the hands of teenagers. It's too good for them.
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Yeah, I'm running for the White House again. Well, it's not a run, really it's sort of a brisk walk.
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People come up to me in bars and on street corners and they say to me, 'Hey, Paulsen, have you got any change?'
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I am neither left wing nor right wing. I am middle-of-the-bird.
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They said I ignored the drug problem. Well, I gave speeches on drugs, I wrote books on drugs. I did darn near everything on drugs!
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We've got to step up our conservation efforts before it's too late. We're not protecting our lands and natural resources. Take the Grand Canyon for example I'm sure that at one time it was a beautiful piece of land, and just look at the way we've let it go.
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I've been on the campaign trail so long, some of my wine has turned to vinegar.
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On the issue of inflation, I think I could solve it no matter how much money it took.
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Wine is something to enjoy. We get sick and tired of people who pick it apart and talk about its 'saucy nuances.'
Pat Paulsen
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Deep down, I happen to be very shallow.
Pat Paulsen
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Every child has a right to go to high school and end up with a third grade education.
Pat Paulsen
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All the problems we face in the United States today can be traced to an unenlightened immigration policy on the part of the American Indian.
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Censorship does not interfere with the constitutional rights of every American to sit alone in a dark room in the nude and cuss.
Pat Paulsen