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In all crises of human affairs there are two broad courses open to a man. He can stay where he is or he can go elsewhere.
P. G. Wodehouse
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P. G. Wodehouse
Age: 93 †
Born: 1881
Born: January 1
Died: 1975
Died: January 1
Humorist
Librettist
Lyricist
Novelist
Playwright
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
Guildford
Surrey
UK
Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
Sir Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
P.G. Wodehouse
Courses
Broads
Two
Broad
Human
Elsewhere
Humans
Affairs
Men
Affair
Crisis
Stay
Open
Crises
More quotes by P. G. Wodehouse
I pressed down the mental accelerator. The old lemon throbbed fiercely. I got an idea.
P. G. Wodehouse
So always look for the silver lining And try to find the sunny side of life.
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I may as well tell you, here and now, that if you are going about the place thinking things pretty, you will never make a modern poet. Be poignant, man, be poignant!
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I suppose he must have taken about a nine or something in hats. Shows what a rotten thing it is to let your brain develop too much.
P. G. Wodehouse
A lesser moustache, under the impact of that quick, agonised expulsion of breath, would have worked loose at the roots.
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Cats, as a class, have never completely got over the snootiness caused by the fact that in ancient Egypt they were worshipped as gods. This makes them prone to set themselves up as critics and censors of the frail and erring human beings whose lot they share.
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Love has had a lot of press-agenting from the oldest times but there are higher, nobler things than love.
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Some time ago, he said, --how long it seems! -- I remember saying to a young friend of mine of the name of Spiller, 'Comrade Spiller, never confuse the unusual with the impossible.' It is my guiding rule in life.
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However devoutly a girl may worship the man of her choice, there always comes a time when she feels an irresistible urge to haul off and let him have it in the neck.
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As a child of eight Mr. Trout had once kissed a girl of six under the mistletoe at a Christmas party, but there his sex life had come to abrupt halt.
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If he had a mind, there was something on it.
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Well, you know, there are limits to the sacred claims of friendship.
P. G. Wodehouse
the supply of the milk of human kindness was short by several gallons
P. G. Wodehouse
A man's subconscious self is not the ideal companion. It lurks for the greater part of his life in some dark den of its own, hidden away, and emerges only to taunt and deride and increase the misery of a miserable hour.
P. G. Wodehouse
Unlike the male codfish which, suddenly finding itself the parent of three million five hundred thousand little codfish, cheerfully resolves to love them all, the British aristocracy is apt to look with a somewhat jaundiced eye on its younger sons.
P. G. Wodehouse
Psmith is the only thing in my literary career which was handed to me on a plate with watercress round it, thus enabling me to avoid the blood, sweat and tears inseparable from an author's life.
P. G. Wodehouse
Flowers are happy things.
P. G. Wodehouse
Love is a delicate plant that needs constant tending and nurturing, and this cannot be done by snorting at the adored object like a gas explosion and calling her friends lice.
P. G. Wodehouse
I laughed derisively. For goodness' sake, don't start gargling now. This is serious. I was laughing. Oh, were you? Well, I'm glad to see you taking it in this merry spirit. Derisively, I explained.
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Memories are like mulligatawny soup in a cheap restaurant. It is wiser not to stir them.
P. G. Wodehouse