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To say that New York came up to its advance billing would be the baldest of understatements. Being there was like being in heaven without going to all the bother and expense of dying.
P. G. Wodehouse
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P. G. Wodehouse
Age: 93 †
Born: 1881
Born: January 1
Died: 1975
Died: January 1
Humorist
Librettist
Lyricist
Novelist
Playwright
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
Guildford
Surrey
UK
Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
Sir Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
P.G. Wodehouse
Would
Advance
Like
Bother
York
Dying
Came
Billing
Heaven
Understatement
Without
Expense
Going
Expenses
More quotes by P. G. Wodehouse
It's a funny thing about looking for things. If you hunt for a needle in a haystack you don't find it. If you don't give a darn whether you ever see the needle or not it runs into you the first time you lean against the stack.
P. G. Wodehouse
Love is a delicate plant that needs constant tending and nurturing, and this cannot be done by snorting at the adored object like a gas explosion and calling her friends lice.
P. G. Wodehouse
Memories are like mulligatawny soup in a cheap restaurant. It is wiser not to stir them.
P. G. Wodehouse
I don't know if you know it, J.B., but you're the sort of fellow who causes hundreds to fall under suspicion when he's found stabbed in his library with a paper-knife of Oriental design.
P. G. Wodehouse
It was a morning when all nature shouted Fore! The breeze, as it blew gently up from the valley, seemed to bring a message of hope and cheer, whispering of chip shots holed and brassies landing squarely on the meat. The fairway, as yet unscarred by the irons of a hundred dubs, smiled greenly up at the azure sky.
P. G. Wodehouse
Chumps always make the best husbands. All the unhappy marriages come from the husbands having brains.
P. G. Wodehouse
you ever have that feeling when you step down onto a footstep that isn't there?
P. G. Wodehouse
Flowers are happy things.
P. G. Wodehouse
I pity the shrimp that matches wits with you Jeeves
P. G. Wodehouse
You can't be a successful Dictator and design women's underclothing.
P. G. Wodehouse
This is peculiarly an age in which each of us may, if he do but search diligently, find the literature suited to his mental powers.
P. G. Wodehouse
To find a man's true character, play golf with him.
P. G. Wodehouse
As a child of eight Mr. Trout had once kissed a girl of six under the mistletoe at a Christmas party, but there his sex life had come to abrupt halt.
P. G. Wodehouse
I love writing. I never feel really comfortable unless I am either actually writing or have a story going. I could not stop writing.
P. G. Wodehouse
the supply of the milk of human kindness was short by several gallons
P. G. Wodehouse
It was a confusion of ideas between him and one of the lions he was hunting in Kenya that had caused A. B. Spottsworth to make the obituary column. He thought the lion was dead, and the lion thought it wasn't.
P. G. Wodehouse
I shuddered from stem to stern, as stout barks do when buffeted by the waves.
P. G. Wodehouse
As for Gussie Finknottle, many an experienced undertaker would have been deceived by his appearance and started embalming on sight.
P. G. Wodehouse
Many a man may look respectable, and yet be able to hide at will behind a spiral staircase.
P. G. Wodehouse
I should think it extremely improbable that anyone ever wrote for money. Naturally, when he has written something, he wants to get as much for it as he can, but that is a very different thing from writing for money.
P. G. Wodehouse
