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It is fatal to let any dog know that he is funny, for he immediately loses his head and starts hamming it up.
P. G. Wodehouse
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P. G. Wodehouse
Age: 93 †
Born: 1881
Born: January 1
Died: 1975
Died: January 1
Humorist
Librettist
Lyricist
Novelist
Playwright
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
Guildford
Surrey
UK
Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
Sir Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
P.G. Wodehouse
Fatal
Immediately
Starts
Dog
Loses
Head
Funny
More quotes by P. G. Wodehouse
Well, you certainly are the most wonderfully woolly baa-lamb that ever stepped.
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As a dancer, I out-Fred the nimblest Astaire.
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If men's minds were like dominoes, surely his would be the double blank.
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No novelists any good except me. Sovietski -- yah! Nastikoff -- bah! I spit me of zem all. No novelists anywhere any good except me. P. G. Wodehouse and Tolstoi not bad. Not good, but not bad. No novelists any good except me.
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I always strive, when I can, to spread sweetness and light. There have been several complaints about it.
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Oh, I don't know, you know, don't you know?
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She's one of those soppy girls, riddled from head to foot with whimsy. She holds the view that the stars are God's daisy chain, that rabbits are gnomes in attendance on the Fairy Queen, and that every time a fairy blows its wee nose a baby is born, which, as we know, is not the case. She's a drooper.
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I don't want to seem always to be criticizing your methods of voice production, Jeeves, I said, but I must inform you that that 'Well, sir' of yours is in many respects fully as unpleasant as your 'Indeed, sir?
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It's a funny thing about looking for things. If you hunt for a needle in a haystack you don't find it. If you don't give a darn whether you ever see the needle or not it runs into you the first time you lean against the stack.
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Memories are like mulligatawny soup in a cheap restaurant. It is wiser not to stir them.
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Golf, like the measles, should be caught young, for, if postponed to riper years, the results may be serious.
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To say that New York came up to its advance billing would be the baldest of understatements. Being there was like being in heaven without going to all the bother and expense of dying.
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What ho! I said. What ho! said Motty. What ho! What ho! What ho! What ho! What ho! After that it seemed rather difficult to go on with the conversation.
P. G. Wodehouse
She could not have gazed at him with a more rapturous intensity if she had been a small child and he a saucer of ice cream.
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You know how it is with some girls. They seem to take the stuffing right out of you. I mean to say, there is something about their personality that paralyses the vocal cords and reduces the contents of the brain to cauliflower.
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...with each new book of mine I have always the feeling that this time I have picked a lemon in the garden of literature.
P. G. Wodehouse
Few of them were to be trusted within reach of a trowel and a pile of bricks.
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Now, I'm a mixer. I can't help it. It's my nature. I like men. I like the taste of their boots, the smell of their legs, and the sound of their voices. It may be weak of me, but a man has only to speak to me, and a sort of thrill goes down my spine and sets my tail wagging.
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And she's got brains enough for two, which is the exact quantity the girl who marries you will need.
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I started violently, as if some unseen hand had goosed me.
P. G. Wodehouse
