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Why don't you get a haircut? You look like a chrysanthemum.
P. G. Wodehouse
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P. G. Wodehouse
Age: 93 †
Born: 1881
Born: January 1
Died: 1975
Died: January 1
Humorist
Librettist
Lyricist
Novelist
Playwright
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
Guildford
Surrey
UK
Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
Sir Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
P.G. Wodehouse
Sarcastic
Humorous
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Looks
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Chrysanthemums
Haircut
Hairstyles
Haircuts
More quotes by P. G. Wodehouse
I always strive, when I can, to spread sweetness and light. There have been several complaints about it.
P. G. Wodehouse
Whenever I have that sad, depressed feeling, I go out and kill a policeman.
P. G. Wodehouse
It is not mere technical skill that makes a man a golfer, it is the golfing soul.
P. G. Wodehouse
I don't know if you know it, J.B., but you're the sort of fellow who causes hundreds to fall under suspicion when he's found stabbed in his library with a paper-knife of Oriental design.
P. G. Wodehouse
There is only one cure for gray hair. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine.
P. G. Wodehouse
Unlike the male codfish which, suddenly finding itself the parent of three million five hundred thousand little codfish, cheerfully resolves to love them all, the British aristocracy is apt to look with a somewhat jaundiced eye on its younger sons.
P. G. Wodehouse
Confidence, of course is an admirable asset to a golfer, but it should be an unspoken confidence. It is perilous to put it into speech. The gods of golf lie in wait to chasten the presumptious.
P. G. Wodehouse
I'm not absolutely certain of the facts, but I rather fancy it's Shakespeare who says that it's always just when a fellow is feeling particularly braced with things in general that Fate sneaks up behind him with the bit of lead piping.
P. G. Wodehouse
There's too much of that where-every-prospect-pleases-and-only-man-is-vile stuff buzzing around for my taste.
P. G. Wodehouse
His eyes were rolling in their sockets, and his face had taken on the colour and expression of a devout tomato. I could see he loved like a thousand bricks.
P. G. Wodehouse
It is fatal to let any dog know that he is funny, for he immediately loses his head and starts hamming it up.
P. G. Wodehouse
One of the drawbacks to life is that it contains moments when one is compelled to tell the truth.
P. G. Wodehouse
Dark hair fell in a sweep over his forehead. He looked like a man who would write vers libre, as indeed he did.
P. G. Wodehouse
Just another proof, of course, of what I often say - it takes all sorts to make a world.
P. G. Wodehouse
The real objection to the great majority of cats is their insufferable air of superiority.
P. G. Wodehouse
My motto is 'Love and let love' - with the one stipulation that people who love in glass-houses should breathe on the windows.
P. G. Wodehouse
You know how it is with some girls. They seem to take the stuffing right out of you. I mean to say, there is something about their personality that paralyses the vocal cords and reduces the contents of the brain to cauliflower.
P. G. Wodehouse
She gave me another of those long keen looks, and I could see that she was again asking herself if her favourite nephew wasn't steeped to the tonsils in the juice of the grape.
P. G. Wodehouse
The only way of really finding out a man's true character is to play golf with him. In no other walk of life does the cloven hoof so quickly display itself.
P. G. Wodehouse
I pressed down the mental accelerator. The old lemon throbbed fiercely. I got an idea.
P. G. Wodehouse
