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Golf, like the measles, should be caught young, for, if postponed to riper years, the results may be serious.
P. G. Wodehouse
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P. G. Wodehouse
Age: 93 †
Born: 1881
Born: January 1
Died: 1975
Died: January 1
Humorist
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Guildford
Surrey
UK
Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
Sir Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
P.G. Wodehouse
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More quotes by P. G. Wodehouse
[He] saw that a peculiar expression had come into his nephew's face an expression a little like that of a young hindu fakir who having settled himself on his first bed of spikes is beginning to wish that he had chosen one of the easier religions.
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You agreee with me that the situation is a lulu? Certainly, a somewhat sharp crisis in your affairs would appear to have been precipitated, Sir.
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So always look for the silver lining And try to find the sunny side of life.
P. G. Wodehouse
But everything is relative, Bertie... You, for instance, are my relative, and I am your relative.
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You're one of those guys who can make a party just by leaving it. It's a great gift.
P. G. Wodehouse
you ever have that feeling when you step down onto a footstep that isn't there?
P. G. Wodehouse
The exquisite code of politeness of the Woosters prevented me clipping her one on the ear-hole, but I would have given a shilling to be able to do it. There seemed to me something deliberately fat-headed in the way she persisted in missing the gist.
P. G. Wodehouse
But what is the love life of newts, if you boil it right down? Didn't you tell me once that they just waggled their tails at one another in the mating season?''Quite correct.' I shrugged my shoulders. 'Well all right, if they like it. But it's not my idea of molten passion.
P. G. Wodehouse
I don't want to seem always to be criticizing your methods of voice production, Jeeves, I said, but I must inform you that that 'Well, sir' of yours is in many respects fully as unpleasant as your 'Indeed, sir?
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[I'm] as broke as the ten commandments.
P. G. Wodehouse
The real objection to the great majority of cats is their insufferable air of superiority.
P. G. Wodehouse
When it comes to letting the world in on the secrets of his heart, he has about as much shrinking reticence as a steam calliope.
P. G. Wodehouse
Luck is a goddess not to be coerced and forcibly wooed by those who seek her favours. From such masterful spirits she turns away. But it happens sometimes that, if we put our hand in hers with the humble trust of a little child, she will have pity on us, and not fail us in our hour of need.
P. G. Wodehouse
The only thing that prevented a father's love from faltering was the fact that there was in his possession a photograph of himself at the same early age, in which he, too, looked like a homicidal fried egg.
P. G. Wodehouse
I started violently, as if some unseen hand had goosed me.
P. G. Wodehouse
And she's got brains enough for two, which is the exact quantity the girl who marries you will need.
P. G. Wodehouse
While not exactly disgruntled, he was far from feeling gruntled. He spoke with a certain what-is-it in his voice, and I could see that, if not actually disgruntled, he was far from being gruntled.
P. G. Wodehouse
Warm-hearted! I should think he has to wear asbestos vests!
P. G. Wodehouse
She gave me another of those long keen looks, and I could see that she was again asking herself if her favourite nephew wasn't steeped to the tonsils in the juice of the grape.
P. G. Wodehouse
Confidence, of course is an admirable asset to a golfer, but it should be an unspoken confidence. It is perilous to put it into speech. The gods of golf lie in wait to chasten the presumptious.
P. G. Wodehouse
