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[I'm] as broke as the ten commandments.

P. G. Wodehouse

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P. G. Wodehouse
Age: 93 †
Born: 1881
Born: January 1
Died: 1975
Died: January 1
Humorist
Librettist
Lyricist
Novelist
Playwright
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
Guildford
Surrey
UK
Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
Sir Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
P.G. Wodehouse
Commandments
Broke
Ten

More quotes by P. G. Wodehouse

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Lady Glossip: Mr. Wooster, how would you support a wife? Bertie Wooster: Well, I suppose it depends on who's wife it was, a little gentle pressure beneath the elbow while crossing a busy street usually fits the bill.
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I know I was writing stories when I was five. I don't know what I did before that. Just loafed I suppose.
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In every romance you have to budget for the occasional dust-up.
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I clutched at the brow. The mice in my interior had now got up an informal dance and were buck-and-winging all over the place like a bunch of Nijinskys.
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They were real golfers, for real golf is a thing of the spirit, not of mere mechanical excellence of stroke.
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The storm is over, there is sunlight in my heart. I have a glass of wine and sit thinking of what has passed.
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Many a man may look respectable, and yet be able to hide at will behind a spiral staircase.
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She could not have gazed at him with a more rapturous intensity if she had been a small child and he a saucer of ice cream.
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Confidence, of course is an admirable asset to a golfer, but it should be an unspoken confidence. It is perilous to put it into speech. The gods of golf lie in wait to chasten the presumptious.
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One of the drawbacks to life is that it contains moments when one is compelled to tell the truth.
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I never was interested in politics. I'm quite unable to work up any kind of belligerent feeling. Just as I'm about to feel belligerent about some country I meet a decent sort of chap. We go out together and lose any fighting thoughts or feelings.
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A man's subconscious self is not the ideal companion. It lurks for the greater part of his life in some dark den of its own, hidden away, and emerges only to taunt and deride and increase the misery of a miserable hour.
P. G. Wodehouse
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-'What do ties matter, Jeeves, at a time like this?' There is no time, sir, at which ties do not matter
P. G. Wodehouse
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If men's minds were like dominoes, surely his would be the double blank.
P. G. Wodehouse
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It is the glorious uncertainty of golf that makes it the game it is.
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I don't want to seem always to be criticizing your methods of voice production, Jeeves, I said, but I must inform you that that 'Well, sir' of yours is in many respects fully as unpleasant as your 'Indeed, sir?
P. G. Wodehouse
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She's one of those soppy girls, riddled from head to foot with whimsy. She holds the view that the stars are God's daisy chain, that rabbits are gnomes in attendance on the Fairy Queen, and that every time a fairy blows its wee nose a baby is born, which, as we know, is not the case. She's a drooper.
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I'm bound to say that New York's a topping place to be exiled in. Everybody was awfully good to me, and there seemed to be plenty of things going on, and I'm a wealthy bird, so everything was fine.
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Whenever I have that sad, depressed feeling, I go out and kill a policeman.
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She looked as if she had been poured into her clothes and had forgotten to say 'when.'
P. G. Wodehouse