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I don't want to seem always to be criticizing your methods of voice production, Jeeves, I said, but I must inform you that that 'Well, sir' of yours is in many respects fully as unpleasant as your 'Indeed, sir?

P. G. Wodehouse

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P. G. Wodehouse
Age: 93 †
Born: 1881
Born: January 1
Died: 1975
Died: January 1
Humorist
Librettist
Lyricist
Novelist
Playwright
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
Guildford
Surrey
UK
Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
Sir Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
P.G. Wodehouse
Many
Fully
Criticizing
Must
Indeed
Inform
Always
Method
Respects
Seem
Unpleasant
Voice
Methods
Seems
Criticize
Wells
Production
Well
Productions

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He enjoys that perfect peace, that peace beyond all understanding, which comes to its maximum only to the man who has given up golf.
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you ever have that feeling when you step down onto a footstep that isn't there?
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And she's got brains enough for two, which is the exact quantity the girl who marries you will need.
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It is the bungled crime that brings remorse.
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I turned on the pillow with a little moan, and at this juncture Jeeves entered with the vital oolong. I clutched at it like a drowning man at a straw hat.
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As we grow older and realize more clearly the limitations of human happiness, we come to see that the only real and abiding pleasure in life is to give pleasure to other people.
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She fitted into my biggest arm-chair as if it had been built round her by someone who knew they were wearing arm-chairs tight about the hips that season
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It's curious how, when you're in love, you yearn to go about doing acts of kindness to everybody.
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It's a funny thing about looking for things. If you hunt for a needle in a haystack you don't find it. If you don't give a darn whether you ever see the needle or not it runs into you the first time you lean against the stack.
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If men's minds were like dominoes, surely his would be the double blank.
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I don't know if you know it, J.B., but you're the sort of fellow who causes hundreds to fall under suspicion when he's found stabbed in his library with a paper-knife of Oriental design.
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It is no use telling me there are bad aunts and good aunts. At the core, they are all alike. Sooner or later, out pops the cloven hoof.
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She's one of those soppy girls, riddled from head to foot with whimsy. She holds the view that the stars are God's daisy chain, that rabbits are gnomes in attendance on the Fairy Queen, and that every time a fairy blows its wee nose a baby is born, which, as we know, is not the case. She's a drooper.
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A lesser moustache, under the impact of that quick, agonised expulsion of breath, would have worked loose at the roots.
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You know how it is with some girls. They seem to take the stuffing right out of you. I mean to say, there is something about their personality that paralyses the vocal cords and reduces the contents of the brain to cauliflower.
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Many a man may look respectable, and yet be able to hide at will behind a spiral staircase.
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It is fatal to let any dog know that he is funny, for he immediately loses his head and starts hamming it up.
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There is only one cure for gray hair. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine.
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This is peculiarly an age in which each of us may, if he do but search diligently, find the literature suited to his mental powers.
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Birds, except when broiled and in the society of a cold bottle, bored him stiff.
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