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But everything is relative, Bertie... You, for instance, are my relative, and I am your relative.
P. G. Wodehouse
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P. G. Wodehouse
Age: 93 †
Born: 1881
Born: January 1
Died: 1975
Died: January 1
Humorist
Librettist
Lyricist
Novelist
Playwright
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
Guildford
Surrey
UK
Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
Sir Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
P.G. Wodehouse
Bertie
Relative
Instance
Everything
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In every romance you have to budget for the occasional dust-up.
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So always look for the silver lining And try to find the sunny side of life.
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To find a man's true character, play golf with him.
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Into the face of the young man who sat on the terrace of the Hotel Magnifique at Cannes there had crept a look of furtive shame, the shifty, hangdog look which announces that an Englishman is about to talk French.
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They pointed out that the friendship between the two artists had always been a byword or whatever you called it. A well-read Egg summed it up by saying that they were like Thingummy and what's-his-name.
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The only thing that prevented a father's love from faltering was the fact that there was in his possession a photograph of himself at the same early age, in which he, too, looked like a homicidal fried egg.
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He felt like a man who, chasing rainbows, has had one of them suddenly turn and bite him in the leg.
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A little bit added to what you've already got gives you a little bit more.
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However devoutly a girl may worship the man of her choice, there always comes a time when she feels an irresistible urge to haul off and let him have it in the neck.
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As a child of eight Mr. Trout had once kissed a girl of six under the mistletoe at a Christmas party, but there his sex life had come to abrupt halt.
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I may as well tell you, here and now, that if you are going about the place thinking things pretty, you will never make a modern poet. Be poignant, man, be poignant!
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She gave me another of those long keen looks, and I could see that she was again asking herself if her favourite nephew wasn't steeped to the tonsils in the juice of the grape.
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Why don't you get a haircut? You look like a chrysanthemum.
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you ever have that feeling when you step down onto a footstep that isn't there?
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I always strive, when I can, to spread sweetness and light. There have been several complaints about it.
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From my earliest years I had always wanted to be a writer. It was not that I had any particular message for humanity. I am still plugging away and not the ghost of one so far, so it begins to look as though, unless I suddenly hit mid-season form in my eighties, humanity will remain a message short.
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There was a sound in the background like a distant sheep coughing gently on a mountainside. Jeeves sailing into action.
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My motto is 'Love and let love' - with the one stipulation that people who love in glass-houses should breathe on the windows.
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