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This was not Aunt Dahlia, my good and kindly aunt, but my Aunt Agatha, the one who chews broken bottles and kills rats with her teeth.
P. G. Wodehouse
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P. G. Wodehouse
Age: 93 †
Born: 1881
Born: January 1
Died: 1975
Died: January 1
Humorist
Librettist
Lyricist
Novelist
Playwright
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
Guildford
Surrey
UK
Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
Sir Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
P.G. Wodehouse
Kindly
Aunt
Rats
Kills
Bottles
Dahlia
Teeth
Chews
Broken
Dahlias
Good
Agatha
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An apple a day, if well aimed, keeps the doctor away.
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That is life. Just one long succession of misunderstandings and rash acts and what not. Absolutely.
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At the age of eleven or thereabouts women acquire a poise and an ability to handle difficult situations which a man, if he is lucky, manages to achieve somewhere in the later seventies.
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It was loud in spots and less loud in other spots, and it had that quality which I have noticed in all violin solos of seeming to last much longer than it actually did.
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You can't be a successful Dictator and design women's underclothing.
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[He] saw that a peculiar expression had come into his nephew's face an expression a little like that of a young hindu fakir who having settled himself on his first bed of spikes is beginning to wish that he had chosen one of the easier religions.
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Well, there it is. That's Jeeves. Where others merely smite the brow and clutch the hair, he acts. Napoleon was the same.
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His whole aspect was that of a man who has unexpectedly been struck by lightning.
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The real objection to the great majority of cats is their insufferable air of superiority.
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He felt like a man who, chasing rainbows, has had one of them suddenly turn and bite him in the leg.
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I pressed down the mental accelerator. The old lemon throbbed fiercely. I got an idea.
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A melancholy-looking man, he had the appearance of one who has searched for the leak in life's gas-pipe with a lighted candle.
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It was a confusion of ideas between him and one of the lions he was hunting in Kenya that had caused A. B. Spottsworth to make the obituary column. He thought the lion was dead, and the lion thought it wasn't.
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Confidence, of course is an admirable asset to a golfer, but it should be an unspoken confidence. It is perilous to put it into speech. The gods of golf lie in wait to chasten the presumptious.
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A lesser moustache, under the impact of that quick, agonised expulsion of breath, would have worked loose at the roots.
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Everything in life that’s any fun, as somebody wisely observed, is either immoral, illegal or fattening.
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It was a nasty look. It made me feel as if I were something the dog had brought in and intended to bury later on, when he had time.
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