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You can't be a successful Dictator and design women's underclothing.
P. G. Wodehouse
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P. G. Wodehouse
Age: 93 †
Born: 1881
Born: January 1
Died: 1975
Died: January 1
Humorist
Librettist
Lyricist
Novelist
Playwright
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
Guildford
Surrey
UK
Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
Sir Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
P.G. Wodehouse
Dictator
Design
Successful
Women
More quotes by P. G. Wodehouse
Well, you know, there are limits to the sacred claims of friendship.
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The spine, and I do not attempt to conceal the fact, had become soluble, in the last degree.
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He looked haggard and careworn, like a Borgia who has suddenly remembered that he has forgotten to shove cyanide in the consommé, and the dinner-gong due any moment.
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In a series of events, all of which had been a bit thick, this, in his opinion, achieved the maximum of thickness.
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The storm is over, there is sunlight in my heart. I have a glass of wine and sit thinking of what has passed.
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What is Love compared with holing out before your opponent?
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There was a sound in the background like a distant sheep coughing gently on a mountainside. Jeeves sailing into action.
P. G. Wodehouse
Woman is the unfathomable, incalculable mystery, the problem we men can never hope to solve.
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She could not have gazed at him with a more rapturous intensity if she had been a small child and he a saucer of ice cream.
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Do men who have got all their marbles go swimming in lakes with their clothes on?
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The real objection to the great majority of cats is their insufferable air of superiority.
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Freddie experienced the sort of abysmal soul-sadness which afflicts one of Tolstoy's Russian peasants when, after putting in a heavy day's work strangling his father, beating his wife, and dropping the baby into the city's reservoir, he turns to the cupboards, only to find the vodka bottle empty.
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Confidence, of course is an admirable asset to a golfer, but it should be an unspoken confidence. It is perilous to put it into speech. The gods of golf lie in wait to chasten the presumptious.
P. G. Wodehouse
I laughed derisively. For goodness' sake, don't start gargling now. This is serious. I was laughing. Oh, were you? Well, I'm glad to see you taking it in this merry spirit. Derisively, I explained.
P. G. Wodehouse
It was one of those parties where you cough twice before you speak and then decide not to say it after all.
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A man's subconscious self is not the ideal companion. It lurks for the greater part of his life in some dark den of its own, hidden away, and emerges only to taunt and deride and increase the misery of a miserable hour.
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I don't want to seem always to be criticizing your methods of voice production, Jeeves, I said, but I must inform you that that 'Well, sir' of yours is in many respects fully as unpleasant as your 'Indeed, sir?
P. G. Wodehouse
I turned on the pillow with a little moan, and at this juncture Jeeves entered with the vital oolong. I clutched at it like a drowning man at a straw hat.
P. G. Wodehouse
I started violently, as if some unseen hand had goosed me.
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[He] saw that a peculiar expression had come into his nephew's face an expression a little like that of a young hindu fakir who having settled himself on his first bed of spikes is beginning to wish that he had chosen one of the easier religions.
P. G. Wodehouse
