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Woman is the unfathomable, incalculable mystery, the problem we men can never hope to solve.
P. G. Wodehouse
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P. G. Wodehouse
Age: 93 †
Born: 1881
Born: January 1
Died: 1975
Died: January 1
Humorist
Librettist
Lyricist
Novelist
Playwright
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
Guildford
Surrey
UK
Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
Sir Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
P.G. Wodehouse
Hope
Woman
Problem
Never
Men
Incalculable
Unfathomable
Solve
Mystery
More quotes by P. G. Wodehouse
Lady Glossip: Mr. Wooster, how would you support a wife? Bertie Wooster: Well, I suppose it depends on who's wife it was, a little gentle pressure beneath the elbow while crossing a busy street usually fits the bill.
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It is fatal to let any dog know that he is funny, for he immediately loses his head and starts hamming it up.
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Luck is a goddess not to be coerced and forcibly wooed by those who seek her favours. From such masterful spirits she turns away. But it happens sometimes that, if we put our hand in hers with the humble trust of a little child, she will have pity on us, and not fail us in our hour of need.
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I always strive, when I can, to spread sweetness and light. There have been several complaints about it.
P. G. Wodehouse
you ever have that feeling when you step down onto a footstep that isn't there?
P. G. Wodehouse
I shoved on a dressing-gown, and flew downstairs like a mighty, rushing wind.
P. G. Wodehouse
Some time ago, he said, --how long it seems! -- I remember saying to a young friend of mine of the name of Spiller, 'Comrade Spiller, never confuse the unusual with the impossible.' It is my guiding rule in life.
P. G. Wodehouse
Judges, as a class, display, in the matter of arranging alimony, that reckless generosity which is found only in men who are giving away someone else's cash.
P. G. Wodehouse
Now, I'm a mixer. I can't help it. It's my nature. I like men. I like the taste of their boots, the smell of their legs, and the sound of their voices. It may be weak of me, but a man has only to speak to me, and a sort of thrill goes down my spine and sets my tail wagging.
P. G. Wodehouse
The spine, and I do not attempt to conceal the fact, had become soluble, in the last degree.
P. G. Wodehouse
Love is a delicate plant that needs constant tending and nurturing, and this cannot be done by snorting at the adored object like a gas explosion and calling her friends lice.
P. G. Wodehouse
I'm not absolutely certain of the facts, but I rather fancy it's Shakespeare who says that it's always just when a fellow is feeling particularly braced with things in general that Fate sneaks up behind him with the bit of lead piping.
P. G. Wodehouse
When you have been just told that the girl you love is definitely betrothed to another, you begin to understand how Anarchists must feel when the bomb goes off too soon.
P. G. Wodehouse
Whenever I have that sad, depressed feeling, I go out and kill a policeman.
P. G. Wodehouse
Some minds are like soup in a poor restaurant—better left unstirred.
P. G. Wodehouse
I love writing. I never feel really comfortable unless I am either actually writing or have a story going. I could not stop writing.
P. G. Wodehouse
My motto is 'Love and let love' - with the one stipulation that people who love in glass-houses should breathe on the windows.
P. G. Wodehouse
I pressed down the mental accelerator. The old lemon throbbed fiercely. I got an idea.
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Unlike the male codfish which, suddenly finding itself the parent of three million five hundred thousand little codfish, cheerfully resolves to love them all, the British aristocracy is apt to look with a somewhat jaundiced eye on its younger sons.
P. G. Wodehouse
While not exactly disgruntled, he was far from feeling gruntled. He spoke with a certain what-is-it in his voice, and I could see that, if not actually disgruntled, he was far from being gruntled.
P. G. Wodehouse