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...with each new book of mine I have always the feeling that this time I have picked a lemon in the garden of literature.
P. G. Wodehouse
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P. G. Wodehouse
Age: 93 †
Born: 1881
Born: January 1
Died: 1975
Died: January 1
Humorist
Librettist
Lyricist
Novelist
Playwright
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
Guildford
Surrey
UK
Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
Sir Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
P.G. Wodehouse
Garden
Feeling
Literature
Feelings
Lemon
Book
Lemons
Always
Picked
Time
Mines
Mine
More quotes by P. G. Wodehouse
His eyes were rolling in their sockets, and his face had taken on the colour and expression of a devout tomato. I could see he loved like a thousand bricks.
P. G. Wodehouse
You know how it is with some girls. They seem to take the stuffing right out of you. I mean to say, there is something about their personality that paralyses the vocal cords and reduces the contents of the brain to cauliflower.
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A girl who bonnets a policeman with an ashcan full of bottles is obviously good wife-and-mother timber.
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The spine, and I do not attempt to conceal the fact, had become soluble, in the last degree.
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A man's subconscious self is not the ideal companion. It lurks for the greater part of his life in some dark den of its own, hidden away, and emerges only to taunt and deride and increase the misery of a miserable hour.
P. G. Wodehouse
[I'm] as broke as the ten commandments.
P. G. Wodehouse
It is not the being paid money in advance that jars the sensitive artist: it is the having to work.
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He had the look of one who had drunk the cup of life and found a dead beetle at the bottom.
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[He] saw that a peculiar expression had come into his nephew's face an expression a little like that of a young hindu fakir who having settled himself on his first bed of spikes is beginning to wish that he had chosen one of the easier religions.
P. G. Wodehouse
The least thing upset him on the links. He missed short putts because of the uproar of the butterflies in the adjoining meadows.
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When it comes to letting the world in on the secrets of his heart, he has about as much shrinking reticence as a steam calliope.
P. G. Wodehouse
And she's got brains enough for two, which is the exact quantity the girl who marries you will need.
P. G. Wodehouse
It's a funny thing about looking for things. If you hunt for a needle in a haystack you don't find it. If you don't give a darn whether you ever see the needle or not it runs into you the first time you lean against the stack.
P. G. Wodehouse
Sober or blotto, this is your motto: keep muddling through.
P. G. Wodehouse
This is peculiarly an age in which each of us may, if he do but search diligently, find the literature suited to his mental powers.
P. G. Wodehouse
I expect I shall feel better after tea.
P. G. Wodehouse
I should think it extremely improbable that anyone ever wrote for money. Naturally, when he has written something, he wants to get as much for it as he can, but that is a very different thing from writing for money.
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Birds, except when broiled and in the society of a cold bottle, bored him stiff.
P. G. Wodehouse
In every romance you have to budget for the occasional dust-up.
P. G. Wodehouse
From my earliest years I had always wanted to be a writer. It was not that I had any particular message for humanity. I am still plugging away and not the ghost of one so far, so it begins to look as though, unless I suddenly hit mid-season form in my eighties, humanity will remain a message short.
P. G. Wodehouse
