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Everything in life that’s any fun, as somebody wisely observed, is either immoral, illegal or fattening.
P. G. Wodehouse
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P. G. Wodehouse
Age: 93 †
Born: 1881
Born: January 1
Died: 1975
Died: January 1
Humorist
Librettist
Lyricist
Novelist
Playwright
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
Guildford
Surrey
UK
Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
Sir Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
P.G. Wodehouse
Life
Wisely
Observed
Immoral
Illegal
Fun
Somebody
Either
Everything
Fattening
More quotes by P. G. Wodehouse
I laughed derisively. For goodness' sake, don't start gargling now. This is serious. I was laughing. Oh, were you? Well, I'm glad to see you taking it in this merry spirit. Derisively, I explained.
P. G. Wodehouse
One of the Georges - I forget which - once said that a certain number of hours´ sleep each night - I cannot recall at the moment how many - made a man something which for the time being has slipped my memory.
P. G. Wodehouse
Love has had a lot of press-agenting from the oldest times but there are higher, nobler things than love.
P. G. Wodehouse
A girl who bonnets a policeman with an ashcan full of bottles is obviously good wife-and-mother timber.
P. G. Wodehouse
Just another proof, of course, of what I often say - it takes all sorts to make a world.
P. G. Wodehouse
He looks much more like a lobster than most lobsters do.
P. G. Wodehouse
Jeeves, you really are a specific dream-rabbit. Thank you, miss. I am glad to have given satisfaction.
P. G. Wodehouse
From my earliest years I had always wanted to be a writer. It was not that I had any particular message for humanity. I am still plugging away and not the ghost of one so far, so it begins to look as though, unless I suddenly hit mid-season form in my eighties, humanity will remain a message short.
P. G. Wodehouse
Whenever I have that sad, depressed feeling, I go out and kill a policeman.
P. G. Wodehouse
Oh, I don't know, you know, don't you know?
P. G. Wodehouse
A man's subconscious self is not the ideal companion. It lurks for the greater part of his life in some dark den of its own, hidden away, and emerges only to taunt and deride and increase the misery of a miserable hour.
P. G. Wodehouse
A lesser moustache, under the impact of that quick, agonised expulsion of breath, would have worked loose at the roots.
P. G. Wodehouse
Woman is the unfathomable, incalculable mystery, the problem we men can never hope to solve.
P. G. Wodehouse
This was not Aunt Dahlia, my good and kindly aunt, but my Aunt Agatha, the one who chews broken bottles and kills rats with her teeth.
P. G. Wodehouse
So always look for the silver lining And try to find the sunny side of life.
P. G. Wodehouse
Memories are like mulligatawny soup in a cheap restaurant. It is wiser not to stir them.
P. G. Wodehouse
He looked haggard and careworn, like a Borgia who has suddenly remembered that he has forgotten to shove cyanide in the consommé, and the dinner-gong due any moment.
P. G. Wodehouse
It is fatal to let any dog know that he is funny, for he immediately loses his head and starts hamming it up.
P. G. Wodehouse
It's not that I don't trust you, Dunstable, it's simply that I don't trust you.
P. G. Wodehouse
That is life. Just one long succession of misunderstandings and rash acts and what not. Absolutely.
P. G. Wodehouse
