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Oh, I don't know, you know, don't you know?
P. G. Wodehouse
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P. G. Wodehouse
Age: 93 †
Born: 1881
Born: January 1
Died: 1975
Died: January 1
Humorist
Librettist
Lyricist
Novelist
Playwright
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
Guildford
Surrey
UK
Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
Sir Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
P.G. Wodehouse
More quotes by P. G. Wodehouse
I mean, imagine how some unfortunate Master Criminal would feel, on coming down to do a murder at the old Grange, if he found that not only was Sherlock Holmes putting in the weekend there, but Hercule Poirot, as well. ~ Bertram Bertie Wooster
P. G. Wodehouse
It is the glorious uncertainty of golf that makes it the game it is.
P. G. Wodehouse
Lady Glossip: Mr. Wooster, how would you support a wife? Bertie Wooster: Well, I suppose it depends on who's wife it was, a little gentle pressure beneath the elbow while crossing a busy street usually fits the bill.
P. G. Wodehouse
It is fatal to let any dog know that he is funny, for he immediately loses his head and starts hamming it up.
P. G. Wodehouse
As we grow older and realize more clearly the limitations of human happiness, we come to see that the only real and abiding pleasure in life is to give pleasure to other people.
P. G. Wodehouse
It was a nasty look. It made me feel as if I were something the dog had brought in and intended to bury later on, when he had time.
P. G. Wodehouse
A girl who bonnets a policeman with an ashcan full of bottles is obviously good wife-and-mother timber.
P. G. Wodehouse
There was a sound in the background like a distant sheep coughing gently on a mountainside. Jeeves sailing into action.
P. G. Wodehouse
It's not that I don't trust you, Dunstable, it's simply that I don't trust you.
P. G. Wodehouse
I'm not absolutely certain of the facts, but I rather fancy it's Shakespeare who says that it's always just when a fellow is feeling particularly braced with things in general that Fate sneaks up behind him with the bit of lead piping.
P. G. Wodehouse
There is no surer foundation for a beautiful friendship than a mutual taste in literature.
P. G. Wodehouse
Mr Howard Saxby, literary agent, was knitting a sock. He knitted a good deal, he would tell you if you asked him, to keep himself from smoking, adding that he also smoked a good deal to keep himself from knitting.
P. G. Wodehouse
You can't be a successful Dictator and design women's underclothing.
P. G. Wodehouse
It was one of those parties where you cough twice before you speak and then decide not to say it after all.
P. G. Wodehouse
Many a man may look respectable, and yet be able to hide at will behind a spiral staircase.
P. G. Wodehouse
It was one of those days you sometimes get latish in the autumn when the sun beams, the birds toot, and there is a bracing tang in the air that sends the blood beetling briskly through the veins.
P. G. Wodehouse
I expect I shall feel better after tea.
P. G. Wodehouse
I can detach myself from the world. If there is a better world to detach oneself from than the one functioning at the moment I have yet to hear of it.
P. G. Wodehouse
Luck is a goddess not to be coerced and forcibly wooed by those who seek her favours. From such masterful spirits she turns away. But it happens sometimes that, if we put our hand in hers with the humble trust of a little child, she will have pity on us, and not fail us in our hour of need.
P. G. Wodehouse
One of the Georges - I forget which - once said that a certain number of hoursĀ“ sleep each night - I cannot recall at the moment how many - made a man something which for the time being has slipped my memory.
P. G. Wodehouse