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As for Gussie Finknottle, many an experienced undertaker would have been deceived by his appearance and started embalming on sight.
P. G. Wodehouse
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P. G. Wodehouse
Age: 93 †
Born: 1881
Born: January 1
Died: 1975
Died: January 1
Humorist
Librettist
Lyricist
Novelist
Playwright
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
Guildford
Surrey
UK
Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
Sir Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
P.G. Wodehouse
Sight
Started
Many
Embalming
Would
Undertaker
Deceived
Experienced
Depression
Appearance
More quotes by P. G. Wodehouse
She could not have gazed at him with a more rapturous intensity if she had been a small child and he a saucer of ice cream.
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If men's minds were like dominoes, surely his would be the double blank.
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One of the poets, whose name I cannot recall, has a passage, which I am unable at the moment to remember, in one of his works, which for the time being has slipped my mind, which hits off admirably this age-old situation.
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-'What do ties matter, Jeeves, at a time like this?' There is no time, sir, at which ties do not matter
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I am told by those who know that there are six varieties of hangover-the Broken Compass, the Sewing Machine, the Comet, the Atomic, the Cement Mixer and the Gremlin Boogie, and his manner suggested that he had got them all.
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To say that New York came up to its advance billing would be the baldest of understatements. Being there was like being in heaven without going to all the bother and expense of dying.
P. G. Wodehouse
One of the rummy things about Jeeves is that, unless you watch like a hawk, you very seldom see him come into a room.
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the supply of the milk of human kindness was short by several gallons
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This was not Aunt Dahlia, my good and kindly aunt, but my Aunt Agatha, the one who chews broken bottles and kills rats with her teeth.
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There is only one cure for gray hair. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine.
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As a child of eight Mr. Trout had once kissed a girl of six under the mistletoe at a Christmas party, but there his sex life had come to abrupt halt.
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The only way of really finding out a man's true character is to play golf with him. In no other walk of life does the cloven hoof so quickly display itself.
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A girl who bonnets a policeman with an ashcan full of bottles is obviously good wife-and-mother timber.
P. G. Wodehouse
It was a confusion of ideas between him and one of the lions he was hunting in Kenya that had caused A. B. Spottsworth to make the obituary column. He thought the lion was dead, and the lion thought it wasn't.
P. G. Wodehouse
One of the Georges - I forget which - once said that a certain number of hoursĀ“ sleep each night - I cannot recall at the moment how many - made a man something which for the time being has slipped my memory.
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She looked away. Her attitude seemed to suggest that she had finished with him, and would be obliged if somebody would come and sweep him up.
P. G. Wodehouse
Jeeves, you really are a specific dream-rabbit. Thank you, miss. I am glad to have given satisfaction.
P. G. Wodehouse
[I'm] as broke as the ten commandments.
P. G. Wodehouse
I don't know if you know it, J.B., but you're the sort of fellow who causes hundreds to fall under suspicion when he's found stabbed in his library with a paper-knife of Oriental design.
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My motto is 'Love and let love' - with the one stipulation that people who love in glass-houses should breathe on the windows.
P. G. Wodehouse