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Whenever I have that sad, depressed feeling, I go out and kill a policeman.
P. G. Wodehouse
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P. G. Wodehouse
Age: 93 †
Born: 1881
Born: January 1
Died: 1975
Died: January 1
Humorist
Librettist
Lyricist
Novelist
Playwright
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
Guildford
Surrey
UK
Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
Sir Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
P.G. Wodehouse
Feeling
Feelings
Policeman
Policemen
Depressed
Whenever
Kill
More quotes by P. G. Wodehouse
It was a morning when all nature shouted Fore! The breeze, as it blew gently up from the valley, seemed to bring a message of hope and cheer, whispering of chip shots holed and brassies landing squarely on the meat. The fairway, as yet unscarred by the irons of a hundred dubs, smiled greenly up at the azure sky.
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In every romance you have to budget for the occasional dust-up.
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No novelists any good except me. Sovietski -- yah! Nastikoff -- bah! I spit me of zem all. No novelists anywhere any good except me. P. G. Wodehouse and Tolstoi not bad. Not good, but not bad. No novelists any good except me.
P. G. Wodehouse
It is the glorious uncertainty of golf that makes it the game it is.
P. G. Wodehouse
To find a man's true character, play golf with him.
P. G. Wodehouse
Love has had a lot of press-agenting from the oldest times but there are higher, nobler things than love.
P. G. Wodehouse
The exquisite code of politeness of the Woosters prevented me clipping her one on the ear-hole, but I would have given a shilling to be able to do it. There seemed to me something deliberately fat-headed in the way she persisted in missing the gist.
P. G. Wodehouse
...it has been well said that it is precisely these moments when we are feeling that ours is the world and everything that's in it that Fate selects for sneaking up on us with the rock in the stocking.
P. G. Wodehouse
The brains of members of the Press departments of motion-picture studios resemble soup at a cheap restaurant. It is wiser not to stir them.
P. G. Wodehouse
I expect I shall feel better after tea.
P. G. Wodehouse
I turned on the pillow with a little moan, and at this juncture Jeeves entered with the vital oolong. I clutched at it like a drowning man at a straw hat.
P. G. Wodehouse
It is fatal to let any dog know that he is funny, for he immediately loses his head and starts hamming it up.
P. G. Wodehouse
When you have been just told that the girl you love is definitely betrothed to another, you begin to understand how Anarchists must feel when the bomb goes off too soon.
P. G. Wodehouse
This was not Aunt Dahlia, my good and kindly aunt, but my Aunt Agatha, the one who chews broken bottles and kills rats with her teeth.
P. G. Wodehouse
As we grow older and realize more clearly the limitations of human happiness, we come to see that the only real and abiding pleasure in life is to give pleasure to other people.
P. G. Wodehouse
I pity the shrimp that matches wits with you Jeeves
P. G. Wodehouse
It is not the being paid money in advance that jars the sensitive artist: it is the having to work.
P. G. Wodehouse
I don’t know if you have had the same experience, but the snag I always come up against when I’m telling a story is this dashed difficult problem of where to begin it.
P. G. Wodehouse
What is Love compared with holing out before your opponent?
P. G. Wodehouse
So always look for the silver lining And try to find the sunny side of life.
P. G. Wodehouse
