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Whenever I have that sad, depressed feeling, I go out and kill a policeman.
P. G. Wodehouse
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P. G. Wodehouse
Age: 93 †
Born: 1881
Born: January 1
Died: 1975
Died: January 1
Humorist
Librettist
Lyricist
Novelist
Playwright
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
Guildford
Surrey
UK
Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
Sir Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
P.G. Wodehouse
Kill
Feeling
Feelings
Policeman
Policemen
Depressed
Whenever
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You're one of those guys who can make a party just by leaving it. It's a great gift.
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As Shakespeare says, if you're going to do a thing you might as well pop right at it and get it over.
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Love is a delicate plant that needs constant tending and nurturing, and this cannot be done by snorting at the adored object like a gas explosion and calling her friends lice.
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An apple a day, if well aimed, keeps the doctor away.
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When it comes to letting the world in on the secrets of his heart, he has about as much shrinking reticence as a steam calliope.
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Jeeves, you really are a specific dream-rabbit. Thank you, miss. I am glad to have given satisfaction.
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He groaned slightly and winced like Prometheus watching his vulture dropping in for lunch.
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In a series of events, all of which had been a bit thick, this, in his opinion, achieved the maximum of thickness.
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I mean, imagine how some unfortunate Master Criminal would feel, on coming down to do a murder at the old Grange, if he found that not only was Sherlock Holmes putting in the weekend there, but Hercule Poirot, as well. ~ Bertram Bertie Wooster
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Routine is the death to heroism.
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The exquisite code of politeness of the Woosters prevented me clipping her one on the ear-hole, but I would have given a shilling to be able to do it. There seemed to me something deliberately fat-headed in the way she persisted in missing the gist.
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They pointed out that the friendship between the two artists had always been a byword or whatever you called it. A well-read Egg summed it up by saying that they were like Thingummy and what's-his-name.
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I suppose half the time Shakespeare just shoved down anything that came into his head.
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I am told by those who know that there are six varieties of hangover-the Broken Compass, the Sewing Machine, the Comet, the Atomic, the Cement Mixer and the Gremlin Boogie, and his manner suggested that he had got them all.
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Into the face of the young man who sat on the terrace of the Hotel Magnifique at Cannes there had crept a look of furtive shame, the shifty, hangdog look which announces that an Englishman is about to talk French.
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This is peculiarly an age in which each of us may, if he do but search diligently, find the literature suited to his mental powers.
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It was one of those parties where you cough twice before you speak and then decide not to say it after all.
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There is only one cure for gray hair. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine.
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