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There's a sort of wooly headed duckiness about you. If I wasn't so crazy about Marmaduke, I could really marry you Bertie.

P. G. Wodehouse

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P. G. Wodehouse
Age: 93 †
Born: 1881
Born: January 1
Died: 1975
Died: January 1
Humorist
Librettist
Lyricist
Novelist
Playwright
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
Guildford
Surrey
UK
Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
Sir Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
P.G. Wodehouse
Marry
Wasn
Crazy
Sort
Really
Bertie
Headed

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I know I was writing stories when I was five. I don't know what I did before that. Just loafed I suppose.
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It is fatal to let any dog know that he is funny, for he immediately loses his head and starts hamming it up.
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There was a sound in the background like a distant sheep coughing gently on a mountainside. Jeeves sailing into action.
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It is the bungled crime that brings remorse.
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The only thing that prevented a father's love from faltering was the fact that there was in his possession a photograph of himself at the same early age, in which he, too, looked like a homicidal fried egg.
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It was one of those cases where you approve the broad, general principle of an idea but can't help being in a bit of a twitter at the prospect of putting it into practical effect. I explained this to Jeeves, and he said much the same thing had bothered Hamlet.
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Some minds are like soup in a poor restaurant—better left unstirred.
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You can't be a successful Dictator and design women's underclothing.
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I may as well tell you, here and now, that if you are going about the place thinking things pretty, you will never make a modern poet. Be poignant, man, be poignant!
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But what is the love life of newts, if you boil it right down? Didn't you tell me once that they just waggled their tails at one another in the mating season?''Quite correct.' I shrugged my shoulders. 'Well all right, if they like it. But it's not my idea of molten passion.
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As a dancer, I out-Fred the nimblest Astaire.
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I never was interested in politics. I'm quite unable to work up any kind of belligerent feeling. Just as I'm about to feel belligerent about some country I meet a decent sort of chap. We go out together and lose any fighting thoughts or feelings.
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He felt like a man who, chasing rainbows, has had one of them suddenly turn and bite him in the leg.
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There's too much of that where-every-prospect-pleases-and-only-man-is-vile stuff buzzing around for my taste.
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Woman is the unfathomable, incalculable mystery, the problem we men can never hope to solve.
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