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Golf, like measles, should be caught young.

P. G. Wodehouse

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P. G. Wodehouse
Age: 93 †
Born: 1881
Born: January 1
Died: 1975
Died: January 1
Humorist
Librettist
Lyricist
Novelist
Playwright
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
Guildford
Surrey
UK
Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
Sir Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
P.G. Wodehouse
Funny
Young
Like
Measles
Golf
Caught

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In his normal state he would not strike a lamb. I’ve known him to do it’ ‘Do what?’ ‘Not strike lambs
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One of the rummy things about Jeeves is that, unless you watch like a hawk, you very seldom see him come into a room.
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Unlike the male codfish which, suddenly finding itself the parent of three million five hundred thousand little codfish, cheerfully resolves to love them all, the British aristocracy is apt to look with a somewhat jaundiced eye on its younger sons.
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In all crises of human affairs there are two broad courses open to a man. He can stay where he is or he can go elsewhere.
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One of the drawbacks to life is that it contains moments when one is compelled to tell the truth.
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But everything is relative, Bertie... You, for instance, are my relative, and I am your relative.
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A man's subconscious self is not the ideal companion. It lurks for the greater part of his life in some dark den of its own, hidden away, and emerges only to taunt and deride and increase the misery of a miserable hour.
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I'm not absolutely certain of the facts, but I rather fancy it's Shakespeare who says that it's always just when a fellow is feeling particularly braced with things in general that Fate sneaks up behind him with the bit of lead piping.
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To persons of spirit like ourselves the only happy marriage is that which is based on a firm foundation of almost incessant quarrelling.
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Lady Glossip: Mr. Wooster, how would you support a wife? Bertie Wooster: Well, I suppose it depends on who's wife it was, a little gentle pressure beneath the elbow while crossing a busy street usually fits the bill.
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The real objection to the great majority of cats is their insufferable air of superiority.
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Many a man may look respectable, and yet be able to hide at will behind a spiral staircase.
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Just another proof, of course, of what I often say - it takes all sorts to make a world.
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If men's minds were like dominoes, surely his would be the double blank.
P. G. Wodehouse
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When it comes to letting the world in on the secrets of his heart, he has about as much shrinking reticence as a steam calliope.
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It is not mere technical skill that makes a man a golfer, it is the golfing soul.
P. G. Wodehouse
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Some time ago, he said, --how long it seems! -- I remember saying to a young friend of mine of the name of Spiller, 'Comrade Spiller, never confuse the unusual with the impossible.' It is my guiding rule in life.
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In a series of events, all of which had been a bit thick, this, in his opinion, achieved the maximum of thickness.
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-'What do ties matter, Jeeves, at a time like this?' There is no time, sir, at which ties do not matter
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If he had a mind, there was something on it.
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