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Golf, like measles, should be caught young.

P. G. Wodehouse

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P. G. Wodehouse
Age: 93 †
Born: 1881
Born: January 1
Died: 1975
Died: January 1
Humorist
Librettist
Lyricist
Novelist
Playwright
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
Guildford
Surrey
UK
Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
Sir Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
P.G. Wodehouse
Measles
Golf
Caught
Funny
Young
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Woman is the unfathomable, incalculable mystery, the problem we men can never hope to solve.
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It isn't often that Aunt Dahlia lets her angry passions rise, but when she does, strong men climb trees and pull them up after them.
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Jeeves, you really are a specific dream-rabbit. Thank you, miss. I am glad to have given satisfaction.
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I mean, imagine how some unfortunate Master Criminal would feel, on coming down to do a murder at the old Grange, if he found that not only was Sherlock Holmes putting in the weekend there, but Hercule Poirot, as well. ~ Bertram Bertie Wooster
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[I'm] as broke as the ten commandments.
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To say that New York came up to its advance billing would be the baldest of understatements. Being there was like being in heaven without going to all the bother and expense of dying.
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It's a funny thing about looking for things. If you hunt for a needle in a haystack you don't find it. If you don't give a darn whether you ever see the needle or not it runs into you the first time you lean against the stack.
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the supply of the milk of human kindness was short by several gallons
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One of the drawbacks to life is that it contains moments when one is compelled to tell the truth.
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It is not the being paid money in advance that jars the sensitive artist: it is the having to work.
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Whenever I have that sad, depressed feeling, I go out and kill a policeman.
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He looks much more like a lobster than most lobsters do.
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I'm not absolutely certain of the facts, but I rather fancy it's Shakespeare who says that it's always just when a fellow is feeling particularly braced with things in general that Fate sneaks up behind him with the bit of lead piping.
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And she's got brains enough for two, which is the exact quantity the girl who marries you will need.
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There are three things in the world that he held in the smallest esteem - slugs, poets and caddies with hiccups.
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The only thing that prevented a father's love from faltering was the fact that there was in his possession a photograph of himself at the same early age, in which he, too, looked like a homicidal fried egg.
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Freddie experienced the sort of abysmal soul-sadness which afflicts one of Tolstoy's Russian peasants when, after putting in a heavy day's work strangling his father, beating his wife, and dropping the baby into the city's reservoir, he turns to the cupboards, only to find the vodka bottle empty.
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I love writing. I never feel really comfortable unless I am either actually writing or have a story going. I could not stop writing.
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My motto is 'Love and let love' - with the one stipulation that people who love in glass-houses should breathe on the windows.
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Judges, as a class, display, in the matter of arranging alimony, that reckless generosity which is found only in men who are giving away someone else's cash.
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