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It is common knowledge to every schoolboy and even every Bachelor of Arts, That all sin is divided into two parts. One kind of sin is called a sin of commission, and that is very important

Ogden Nash

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Ogden Nash
Age: 68 †
Born: 1902
Born: August 19
Died: 1971
Died: May 19
Poet
Screenwriter
Writer
New York
United States
Frederic Ogden Nash
Kind
Knowledge
Bachelors
Common
Commission
Artist
Divided
Art
Arts
Two
Parts
Important
Sin
Even
Education
Schoolboy
Every
Called
Bachelor

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Here is a pen and here is a pencil, here's a typewriter, here's a stencil, here's a list of today's appointments, and all the flies in all the ointments, the daily woes that a man endures -- take them, George, they're yours!
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One would be in less danger From the wiles of the stranger If one's own kin and kith Were more fun to be with.
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Here's a toast to the roast that good fellowship lends, with the sparkle of beer and wine May its sentiment always be deeper, my friends, than the foam at the top of the stein. Then here's to the heartening wassail, wherever good fellows are found Be its master instead of its vassal, and order the glasses around.
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I don't mind their having a lot of money, and I don't care how they employ it, but I do think that they damn well ought to admit they enjoy it.
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Husbands are things that wives have to get used to putting up with. And with whom they breakfast with and sup with. They interfere with the discipline of nurseries, And forget anniversaries, And when they have been particularly remiss, They think they can cure everything with a great big kiss.
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Where there is a monster, there is a miracle.
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Sleep is perverse as human nature, Sleep is perverse as legislature.... So people who go to bed to sleep Must count French premiers or sheep, And people who ought to arise from bed Yawn and go back to sleep instead.
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Good wine needs no bush, And perhaps products that people really want Need no hard-sell or soft-sell TV push. Why not? Look at pot.
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Celery, raw, Develops the jaw
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The further through life I drift the more obvious it becomes that I am lacking in thrift.
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Then blessings on thee, my afternoon torpor Thou makest a prince of a mental porpor.
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The trouble with a kitten is that eventually it becomes a cat.
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He is not drunk, who from the floor, can rise and stand and shout for more
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Another good thing about gossip is that it is within everybody's reach, And it is much more interesting than any other form of speech.
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Bankers are just like everybody else, except richer.
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Middle-aged life is merry, and I love to lead it.
Ogden Nash
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The door of a bigoted mind opens outwards so that the only result of the pressure of facts upon it is to close it more snugly.
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O money, money, money. I'm not necessarily one of those who think thee holy, but I often stop to wonder how thou canst go out so fast when thou comest in so slowly.
Ogden Nash
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One rule which woe betides the banker who fails to heed it/Never lend any money to anybody unless they don't need it.
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Happiness is having a scratch for every itch.
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