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Here is a pen and here is a pencil, here's a typewriter, here's a stencil, here's a list of today's appointments, and all the flies in all the ointments, the daily woes that a man endures -- take them, George, they're yours!
Ogden Nash
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Ogden Nash
Age: 68 †
Born: 1902
Born: August 19
Died: 1971
Died: May 19
Poet
Screenwriter
Writer
New York
United States
Frederic Ogden Nash
Lists
Typewriters
George
Appointments
Daily
Pencil
Endure
Woe
Office
Pencils
Today
Flies
Woes
Take
Pens
Typewriter
Men
List
Endures
More quotes by Ogden Nash
Stuyvesant chats with Kelly and Katz, The professor warms to the broker, And life is good in the brotherhood Of an air-conditioned smoker.
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O money, money, money. I'm not necessarily one of those who think thee holy, but I often stop to wonder how thou canst go out so fast when thou comest in so slowly.
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There is something about a martini, Ere the dining and dancing begin, And to tell you the truth, It is not the vermouth- I think that perhaps it's the gin.
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All that glitters is sold as gold.
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He without benefit of scruples - His fun and money soon quadruples.
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People who work sitting down get paid more than people who work standing up.
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The turtle lives 'twixt plated decks Which practically conceal its sex I think it clever of the turtle In such a fix to be so fertile.
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The trouble with a kitten is that eventually it becomes a cat.
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Marriage is the only known example of the happy meeting of the immovable object and the irresistible force.
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Don't over-analyze your marriage it's like yanking up a fragile indoor plant every 20 minutes to see how its roots are growing.
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A husband is a man who two minutes after his head touches the pillow is snoring like an overloaded omnibus.
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One thing that literature would be greatly the better for Would be a more restricted employment by authors of simile and>metaphor.
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There are two kinds of people who blow through life like a breeze, And one kind is gossipers, and the other kind is gossipees.
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Neath tile or thatch That man is rich Who has a scratch For every itch.
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Some hate broccoli, some hate bacon I hate having my picture taken. How can your family claim to love you And then demand a picture of you?
Ogden Nash
Here lies my past, Goodbye I have kissed it Thank you kids, I wouldn't have missed it.
Ogden Nash
Then blessings on thee, my afternoon torpor Thou makest a prince of a mental porpor.
Ogden Nash
No, you never get any fun Out of the things you haven't done.
Ogden Nash
One man's remorse is another man's reminiscence.
Ogden Nash
Time is like the ocean, always there, always different.
Ogden Nash