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Hypocrisy is the outward acknowledgment of inward shame.

Norm MacDonald

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Norm MacDonald
Age: 65
Born: 1959
Born: October 17
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Quebec
Inward
Shame
Acknowledgment
Outward
Hypocrisy

More quotes by Norm MacDonald

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Last Christmas, I got the worst gift a guy ever gave me. He gave me a lottery ticket... what's the guy even thinking there. Here you go... nothing! Merry Christmas! It's nothing!
Norm MacDonald
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I generally have a real strong idea or a strong punchline, and I just try to get to it by rambling around, as I don't like to memorize words.
Norm MacDonald
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The vanity of being asked advice often makes us confirm the opinion of those that consult us.
Norm MacDonald
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Few criminals die sensible of their crimes.
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Note to self... Sex with blow-up doll is not as good as advertised.
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With the ambitious, the failure of one expedient is the suggestion of another but with the irresolute, defeat usually occasions abandonment of purpose.
Norm MacDonald
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The first principle of solid wisdom is discretion, without it all the erudition of life is merely bagatelle.
Norm MacDonald
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All my life's about is cracking up people and them cracking me up and trying not to think about dying. That doesn't cost very much money.
Norm MacDonald
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Envy, like a false mirror, distorts the symmetry of the sweetest form.
Norm MacDonald
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I don't know anything about politics. Like, zero. Nothing.
Norm MacDonald
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I don't care for sex. I find it an embarrassing, dull exercise. I prefer sports, where you can win.
Norm MacDonald
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None seem to bear the imputation of supposed guilt with greater intolerance than such as are, on other occasions, obviously culpable of vice or crime.
Norm MacDonald
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A proper disposition of time leaves a man at leisure in the very bustle of affairs without delaying the attention of his concerns to the last or giving them unnecessary application at first: it affords a season for everything by affording everything its proper season.
Norm MacDonald
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I got my computer. The great thing about the computer is that you only need enough money to buy a computer and some food, and you're all right. I don't have to go to premières.
Norm MacDonald
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You can't love your team without hating another team.
Norm MacDonald
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It got very tedious saying the same jokes in the same way with the same attitude.
Norm MacDonald
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Stand-up has the best writers, because it's the hardest writing by a million miles.
Norm MacDonald
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They're like ''You're an alcoholic.'' I go ''No, I'm not.'' and then-apparently that's what alcoholics say too, you know?
Norm MacDonald
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I've just seen really, really funny guys, and if I didn't know them, I wouldn't know they were funny from the television. I don't know what it does, it just sucks it away.
Norm MacDonald
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I want you to buy this pit bull. This will protect your valuables.' I don't own anything very valuable. If I buy the pit bull, that would be the most valuable thing I own. I'd have to buy something to protect it then.
Norm MacDonald