Quote

My dad died, and my grandfather died, and my great-grandfather died. And the guy before him, I don't know. Probably died.

Norm MacDonald

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Norm MacDonald
Age: 65
Born: 1959
Born: October 17
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Quebec
Probably
Guy
Funny
Great
Grandfather
Dad
Died
Comedy

More quotes by Norm MacDonald

Image
I've always been very averse to innuendo, especially sexual. I find it cowardly or something.
Norm MacDonald
Image
I want you to buy this pit bull. This will protect your valuables.' I don't own anything very valuable. If I buy the pit bull, that would be the most valuable thing I own. I'd have to buy something to protect it then.
Norm MacDonald
Image
The most frequent cause of regret for what we have done is because its effects interfere with what we would do.
Norm MacDonald
Image
Stand-up has the best writers, because it's the hardest writing by a million miles.
Norm MacDonald
Image
On Update, the only real original thing was trying to take away the cleverness of the punchline and make it as blunt as possible.
Norm MacDonald
Image
Though you may be last to discover your follies, be always first to correct them.
Norm MacDonald
Image
I'm thankful for women. I think women are more intelligent than men. Also, without women, there would be no cookies.
Norm MacDonald
Image
It is the folly of weak-minded people, to imagine they are what flattery or conceit represents them and that it is useless for them to be what they are not, since they seem already to have acquired the reputation of it.
Norm MacDonald
Image
This is a thing I read by a scientist... it said scientists now say that a man thinks about sex once every 7.3 seconds. Now, I know what I think every 7.3 seconds. It's just a bunch of meaningless gibberish.
Norm MacDonald
Image
Scientists believe they may have discovered a primitive form of life on Jupiter's moon Europa. That primitive form of life? You guessed it, Frank Stallone.
Norm MacDonald
Image
I sort of have open invitations from a lot of people to do TV. But it's very hard for me to do roles in sitcoms and movies because I'm not a great actor, so if the material isn't good, I'm in torment while I do it.
Norm MacDonald
Image
There are two things which a man should scrupulously avoid: giving advice that he would not follow, and asking advice when he is determined to pursue his own opinion.
Norm MacDonald
Image
I'm no good at anything but comedy, which I think I'm good at. I'm absolutely no good at networking I'm terrible at acting I'm terrible at dealing with executives I'm terrible at collaborating. And I say whatever I want to say. But I think I'm good enough at comedy that I can survive. And I don't really have an ambition for money.
Norm MacDonald
Image
RIP Amy Winehouse. We lost a true heroin addict today.
Norm MacDonald
Image
Women of no beauty may yet be flattered to believe they possess some others of a moderate share that they have a great deal but those of elegance and charm generally know the perfection of their external graces so well, that they seem to covet that flattery most which heightens the opinion of their wit and judgment.
Norm MacDonald
Image
Many frequently change their principles, but seldom their practices.
Norm MacDonald
Image
I don't have any ambition.
Norm MacDonald
Image
Flattery succeeds best on minds previously occupied by conceit.
Norm MacDonald
Image
I just like doing standup, that's all I'm interested in or good at.
Norm MacDonald
Image
In terms of merit, sports has mathematical statistics. That's how you know who the best player is.
Norm MacDonald