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Some people are so much afraid of being deceived, that they never venture to trust like misers, their avarice destroys their gain.
Norm MacDonald
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Norm MacDonald
Age: 65
Born: 1959
Born: October 17
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Quebec
Trust
Avarice
Much
Destroys
Never
Deceived
Like
Venture
People
Deception
Gain
Gains
Afraid
Misers
More quotes by Norm MacDonald
It is vain to complain of fortune while we fail in policy and conduct.
Norm MacDonald
Your worst and most dangerous enemy is the person that injures you under the pretensions of friendship.
Norm MacDonald
A proper disposition of time leaves a man at leisure in the very bustle of affairs without delaying the attention of his concerns to the last or giving them unnecessary application at first: it affords a season for everything by affording everything its proper season.
Norm MacDonald
Pulp Fiction is a, uh, gritty, urban satire. Pump Friction is a uh-uh, a bunch of uh, dudes and ladies having dirty sex.
Norm MacDonald
Last Christmas, I got the worst gift a guy ever gave me. He gave me a lottery ticket... what's the guy even thinking there. Here you go... nothing! Merry Christmas! It's nothing!
Norm MacDonald
They say that if you're afraid of homosexuals, it means that deep down inside you're actually a homosexual yourself. That worries me because I'm afraid of dogs.
Norm MacDonald
Few criminals die sensible of their crimes.
Norm MacDonald
Education makes some men wiser, others more ridiculous and foolish!
Norm MacDonald
I don't know the difference between a hippie and a hipster but, it's fun to watch either one of them get beat up.
Norm MacDonald
Many people are skeptical about marriage of Michael Jackson and Lisa Marie Pressley. They say, Lisa Marie is more of a sit at home type, while Michael Jackson is more of a homosexual pedophile.
Norm MacDonald
I've shown people Richard Pryor who've never seen him, and most of them don't like him.
Norm MacDonald
Many frequently change their principles, but seldom their practices.
Norm MacDonald
They're like ''You're an alcoholic.'' I go ''No, I'm not.'' and then-apparently that's what alcoholics say too, you know?
Norm MacDonald
RIP Amy Winehouse. We lost a true heroin addict today.
Norm MacDonald
I tried to make the punchline as close to the setup as I could. And I thought that was the perfect thing. If I could make the setup and the punchline identical to each other, I would create a different kind of joke.
Norm MacDonald
I don't have any ambition.
Norm MacDonald
Ignorance is better than knowledge misapplied.
Norm MacDonald
I had a show that people thought used a laugh track. It wasn't it was the real audience going crazy after everything that resembled a joke, that they could technically call a joke.
Norm MacDonald
My dad died, and my grandfather died, and my great-grandfather died. And the guy before him, I don't know. Probably died.
Norm MacDonald
None seem to bear the imputation of supposed guilt with greater intolerance than such as are, on other occasions, obviously culpable of vice or crime.
Norm MacDonald
