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The man that does not fear punishment, little regards crime.

Norm MacDonald

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Norm MacDonald
Age: 65
Born: 1959
Born: October 17
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Quebec
Regard
Crime
Fear
Doe
Littles
Little
Men
Regards
Punishment

More quotes by Norm MacDonald

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With the ambitious, the failure of one expedient is the suggestion of another but with the irresolute, defeat usually occasions abandonment of purpose.
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Note to self... Sex with blow-up doll is not as good as advertised.
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Richard Pryor is my favorite stand-up ever.
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You ever be having a really good dream, and then, uh- right in the middle of the dream you wake up, right in the best part of the dream? And there you are, back in your stinkin' life again? Man, that's rough, eh?
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I started on 'Saturday Night Live' the same time Conan started on 'Late Night.' We just had a relationship because I would be upstairs in the studio and whenever he couldn't get a guest - which was often back then since he was just starting out - he would just call me down to be a guest.
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Your worst and most dangerous enemy is the person that injures you under the pretensions of friendship.
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Many frequently change their principles, but seldom their practices.
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All my life's about is cracking up people and them cracking me up and trying not to think about dying. That doesn't cost very much money.
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On Update, the only real original thing was trying to take away the cleverness of the punchline and make it as blunt as possible.
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Envy, like a false mirror, distorts the symmetry of the sweetest form.
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Happiness is less regulated by external circumstances than inward enjoyment. Whoever is happy in the satisfaction of himself feels imperturbable felicity but he, who trusts entirely to the world for the disposition of his peace, must inevitably participate [in] many privations and disappointments.
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They that are virtuous from principle may receive confidence in every capacity but they that are so from custom or habit, are capable of trust only in matters of ordinary and settled occurrence.
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It is easier to hate those we love, than love those whom we have hated.
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The first principle of solid wisdom is discretion, without it all the erudition of life is merely bagatelle.
Norm MacDonald
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Man, them engagement rings, boy, they cost a lot. I was looking at 'em. Cost like a thousand bucks, two thousand bucks, y'know. Three thousand bucks. Something like that- four thousand bucks. Big number divisible by a thousand, anyways.
Norm MacDonald
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Note to self: no matter how bad life gets, there's always beer.
Norm MacDonald
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You're used to a TV show, and TV is just made for TV shows. It's not made for live events.So anyways, I was resistant to it, but I did it anyway.
Norm MacDonald
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I had a show that people thought used a laugh track. It wasn't it was the real audience going crazy after everything that resembled a joke, that they could technically call a joke.
Norm MacDonald
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I hate fame. I hate being recognized, because I don't know how to talk to people.
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Most men will go farther to give advice than to follow their own opinion.
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