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Whenever I do theaters, I don't like 'em. I don't think they're right for stand-up.
Norm MacDonald
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Norm MacDonald
Age: 65
Born: 1959
Born: October 17
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Quebec
Ems
Whenever
Theater
Stand
Right
Think
Thinking
Like
Theaters
More quotes by Norm MacDonald
I love writing - it's the best. But I really hate collaboration.
Norm MacDonald
It got very tedious saying the same jokes in the same way with the same attitude.
Norm MacDonald
The Rolling Stones reunited for a twenty-fifth anniversary tour last week. Keith Richards said that he's happy to continue to do what he's been doing for the past twenty-five years: cheating death.
Norm MacDonald
Laws, however divine in origin and institution, would be found of little coercion among men, were the administration of them not committed to mortals.
Norm MacDonald
Compared to politics, I think sports is funnier, because it's inconsequential. And politics can be real important and all that. The more pointless something is, the funnier it is, you know? And the more grave or important things are... You know, some comedians can get this disease where they get serious all the time.
Norm MacDonald
I've always been very averse to innuendo, especially sexual. I find it cowardly or something.
Norm MacDonald
Kenny G has a Christmas album out this year. Hey, happy birthday Jesus! Hope you like crap!
Norm MacDonald
Ignorance is better than knowledge misapplied.
Norm MacDonald
I'm not gay, so I don't know much about Broadway musicals.
Norm MacDonald
Many frequently change their principles, but seldom their practices.
Norm MacDonald
This would have been a great game to watch if we didn't have any money on it.
Norm MacDonald
They say that if you're afraid of homosexuals, it means that deep down inside you're actually a homosexual yourself. That worries me because I'm afraid of dogs.
Norm MacDonald
The only two TV shows I saw do that, where they don't warm them up and you can really bomb, was Saturday Night Live - and that's why it gets a lot of heat, too. Obviously it gets criticism fairly, too. But a lot of it is because Lorne [Michaels] lets the audience decide and doesn't force them to laugh.
Norm MacDonald
Your worst and most dangerous enemy is the person that injures you under the pretensions of friendship.
Norm MacDonald
Violent people usually express their love of a thing by their hatred of its opposite.
Norm MacDonald
The joy a person is usually seen to express at the conversion of another to his opinion is seldom more than the impulse of egotistical satisfaction at being considered worthy of didactic imitation.
Norm MacDonald
Education makes some men wiser, others more ridiculous and foolish!
Norm MacDonald
I tried to make the punchline as close to the setup as I could. And I thought that was the perfect thing. If I could make the setup and the punchline identical to each other, I would create a different kind of joke.
Norm MacDonald
We often suffer more from our fears, than from the dangers of our situation.
Norm MacDonald
You ever be having a really good dream, and then, uh- right in the middle of the dream you wake up, right in the best part of the dream? And there you are, back in your stinkin' life again? Man, that's rough, eh?
Norm MacDonald
