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The ultimate disguise is nothing. Nudity.
Nick Offerman
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Nick Offerman
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: June 26
Actor
Carpenter
Film Actor
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Joliet
Illinois
Nicholas Offerman
Nicholas David Offerman
Nudity
Disguise
Ultimate
Nothing
More quotes by Nick Offerman
Shut your damn mouth.
Nick Offerman
I'm obsessed with the Victorian era and the British Royal Navy... I'd love to play a troubled sailor or captain or a boatman on a three masted ship.
Nick Offerman
I am a saxophone player.
Nick Offerman
I just always had a penchant for performing for people.I'm a jackass clown.
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When I got to Los Angeles, I started building cabins in peoples’ yards, building post-and-beam structures and cutting the joinery for those.
Nick Offerman
I learned the word non-conformist in fourth grade and immediately announced that I would grow up to become one.
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I think what makes so many other actors miserable is focusing completely on making other plans. They're obsessed with their haircut and their headshot and their agent, their IMDB profile or whatever.
Nick Offerman
Men and women alike, if you think that altering the tip of your nose with surgery will make you happier, I would suggest you alter something much more malleable than your flesh, like your priorities, or your friends.
Nick Offerman
I've had to learn and discipline myself that I'm much happier and much less depressed if I give myself a project. It's just that simple.
Nick Offerman
I keep having these bros come up to me and say, I used to watch you when I was a fetus, and I just want to kill them.
Nick Offerman
When I arrive in Los Angeles in the entertainment community, and I use implements like a shovel and a hammer, our society has distanced itself so far from working with its hands that those incredibly pedestrian skills are perceived as somehow being extraordinary.
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Whatever it is you like to do, that's the sexiest part of you.
Nick Offerman
My wife happens to be probably the greatest working woman in comedy. I can't think of anyone who even approaches her achievements and her abilities.
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The quest for the next key art awards begins with tomorrow's hangover
Nick Offerman
The world is split into two halves: the bacon, and the bacon eaters.
Nick Offerman
Damn it all, you have been given a life on this beautiful planet! Get off your ass and do something!
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Of course smartphones are brilliant inventions, but the nefarious thing about Twitter and other social media is that it starts to fill all the gaps in your day. I quickly become an addict.
Nick Offerman
When it comes to marijuana, I think it's ridiculous to live in a country that espouses freedom, liberty and equality, yet won't follow through on a philosophy that says: If it's not hurting anybody or their property, you can do any goddamn thing you want.
Nick Offerman
I feel it's important to point out that I've earned my humility by being a jackass - like, I trip and fall on my face and say, Oh, right. Don't think you're a big shot, because you've got a bloody nose now. So it's hard to say.
Nick Offerman
When we think of an actor, we think of a tanned, frosted-tipped, model-looking guy. We don't think of a plumber.
Nick Offerman