Share
×
Inspirational Quotes
Authors
Professions
Topics
Tags
Quote
I learned as a young man that I don't write jokes, but that I can deliver more mundane material and get a laugh. I call myself a humorist.
Nick Offerman
Share
Change background
T
T
T
Change font
Original
TAGS & TOPICS
Nick Offerman
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: June 26
Actor
Carpenter
Film Actor
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Joliet
Illinois
Nicholas Offerman
Nicholas David Offerman
Learned
Humorists
Call
Mundane
Write
Deliver
Young
Material
Writing
Jokes
Men
Laugh
Materials
Laughing
Humorist
More quotes by Nick Offerman
I've split my life between a few different disciplines.
Nick Offerman
Men and women alike, if you think that altering the tip of your nose with surgery will make you happier, I would suggest you alter something much more malleable than your flesh, like your priorities, or your friends.
Nick Offerman
If properly dried and trimmed, New York-style pizza could be used to make a box for Chicago-style pizza. I love a slice when I'm in NYC, but it's like eating a Slim Jim compared with a filet mignon. One slice of Gino's East stuffed sausage pizza is a bigger meal than an entire New York pie.
Nick Offerman
I also grew up building theatrical scenery. I spent many years building scenery as a large part of my income and that allowed me to really develop my shop skills.
Nick Offerman
I think it's fascinating that I receive attention for what people perceive to be a level of manliness or machismo, when amongst my family of farmers and paramedics and regular Americans, I'm kind of the sissy in my family.
Nick Offerman
Jobs that require a suit upset me. They displease me much, as our world is rife with such superficial conformity.
Nick Offerman
When it comes to marijuana, I think it's ridiculous to live in a country that espouses freedom, liberty and equality, yet won't follow through on a philosophy that says: If it's not hurting anybody or their property, you can do any goddamn thing you want.
Nick Offerman
Not only do I recommend Wendell Berry to anyone who will talk to me for more than seven seconds, but I buy his books in quantity and send them to people. I bought a few dozen of his newest, Our Only World.
Nick Offerman
If you like comedy, go home and curl up with Leviticus. The writers of The Onion are handed Leviticus on their first day.
Nick Offerman
When I arrive in Los Angeles in the entertainment community, and I use implements like a shovel and a hammer, our society has distanced itself so far from working with its hands that those incredibly pedestrian skills are perceived as somehow being extraordinary.
Nick Offerman
Your dreams are always going to seem much more profound to you then they are to your friend.
Nick Offerman
I've had to learn and discipline myself that I'm much happier and much less depressed if I give myself a project. It's just that simple.
Nick Offerman
When I got to Los Angeles, I started building cabins in peoples’ yards, building post-and-beam structures and cutting the joinery for those.
Nick Offerman
I have a Kenwood charcoal grill. In our house, if anybody is cooking, it's me. I love making burgers. I love making pork tenderloin. Lamb chops I do on the grill a lot. But you just can't beat brats.
Nick Offerman
Love one another, make something with your hands, and exalt the farmer.
Nick Offerman
I first read Wendell Berry's short-story collections, Fidelity and then Watch with Me. They just knocked my socks off. The characters and the fellowship of the small town reminded me of my own small town in Illinois.Then I discovered that, much like J.R.R. Tolkien and C.S. Lewis, that all of Berry's fiction was centered in this same town.
Nick Offerman
For years I drove a big Ford F250 pickup. That was my ride because two-thirds of my work was wood work, and I'm always driving up to Northern California, where I harvest salvaged trees.
Nick Offerman
If I had more time, I'd watch more woodworking or home-improvement shows, but, not enough hours in the day.
Nick Offerman
Marijuana is quite possibly the finest of intoxicants. It has been scientifically proven, for decades, to be much less harmful to the body than alcohol when used on a regular basis.
Nick Offerman
The first thing I do, after I talk with the director and we agree that I'm going to do the role... My jumping off point is I get a picture of what my 'look' will be. My wardrobe style, my facial hair, glasses and all that kind of stuff.
Nick Offerman