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My wife happens to be probably the greatest working woman in comedy. I can't think of anyone who even approaches her achievements and her abilities.

Nick Offerman

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Nick Offerman
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: June 26
Actor
Carpenter
Film Actor
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Joliet
Illinois
Nicholas Offerman
Nicholas David Offerman
Thinking
Wife
Approaches
Anyone
Achievements
Working
Abilities
Ability
Achievement
Woman
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Comedy
Even
Greatest
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I think what makes so many other actors miserable is focusing completely on making other plans. They're obsessed with their haircut and their headshot and their agent, their IMDB profile or whatever.
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I've learned through experience that to trouble celebrities with my handshake doesn't do anybody any good.
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You know, it's hard to beat bacon at anytime of day. But I also am a big fan of corned beef hash.
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Love one another, make something with your hands, and exalt the farmer.
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Figure out what you love to do, then figure out how to get paid to do it.
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I keep having these bros come up to me and say, I used to watch you when I was a fetus, and I just want to kill them.
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I am always so happy to be at 'SNL.' I still feel like a kid when I'm there, like I can't believe I'm watching them make the show.
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If your shirt isn't tucked into your pants, then your pants are tucked into your shirt.
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Just stand up for your principals and be loyal to your friends and family.
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When I use weed creatively, I'm much better at drawing or making something or playing music. But what I do for a living is mostly performing as an actor or writing, and for those things I need to have my faculties sharp.
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I always drastically changed my look for each role. It's gotten a little tedious in real life, also, because there's no hiding.
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When I was in fourth grade, we were learning vocabulary words, and the word nonconformist came up. The teacher said, It's somebody who whatever everybody is doing, they do the opposite. I remember raising my hand and saying, Mrs. Christiansen, I would like to be a nonconformist.
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I feel it's important to point out that I've earned my humility by being a jackass - like, I trip and fall on my face and say, Oh, right. Don't think you're a big shot, because you've got a bloody nose now. So it's hard to say.
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Damn it all, you have been given a life on this beautiful planet! Get off your ass and do something!
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When I first met with agents, they said, Okay, you're going to play plumbers and mechanics and bus drivers and farmers. Go.
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Men and women alike, if you think that altering the tip of your nose with surgery will make you happier, I would suggest you alter something much more malleable than your flesh, like your priorities, or your friends.
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The world is split into two halves: the bacon, and the bacon eaters.
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People keep referring to me as a standup, and that just doesn't sit well with me because a lot of my friends are standups and they're brilliant at writing jokes, and I'm not.
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I worked mostly in television drama for my first few years. I just kept guesting on NYPD Blues and CSI-like stuff, so when I started getting work in comedy, a lot of people in the business would say, 'Oh - I didn't know you did comedy.'
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I learned in my early years in the theater that I would never become the guy on top. I'll never create a show I don't have a brain expansive enough to see the whole picture, in a way that would behoove anyone.
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