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I would love to learn how to air kiss non-awkwardly.
Ned Beauman
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Ned Beauman
Age: 39
Born: 1985
Born: January 1
Novelist
Writer
London
England
Love
Awkwardly
Kiss
Kissing
Air
Learn
Would
More quotes by Ned Beauman
I read 'The Good Soldier' by Ford Madox Ford again every so often.
Ned Beauman
I don't have a day job, so I read any time of day.
Ned Beauman
So intense was his sexual frustration that it had begun to feel like a life-threatening illness: testicular gout, libidinal gangrene.
Ned Beauman
I always save a huge book for a flight, because then you read it at both airports and on the plane and by the time you get home you're a quarter of the way through and it doesn't feel so unmanageable any more.
Ned Beauman
You couldn’t truly love anything if you didn’t hate at least something. Indeed, perhaps you couldn’t truly love anything if you didn’t hate almost everything.
Ned Beauman
If I want to feel as if I'm being sucked down a fathomless gloomy tunnel for hours and hours then I have a complete set of Schopenhauer at home.
Ned Beauman
Plot is tremendously important to me: I can't stand books where nothing happens, and I can't imagine ever writing a novel without at least one murder.
Ned Beauman
You couldn’t truly love anything if you didn’t hate at least something. Indeed, perhaps you couldn’t truly love anything if you didn’t hate almost everything.
Ned Beauman
I've never really understood that whole thing of writers avoiding other writers' novels while they're working on their own.
Ned Beauman
I hate going back over what I've written. It makes me feel physically sick.
Ned Beauman
The reason I start a novel is because there's something that excites me and I want to explore it.
Ned Beauman
Until I was 16, I read nothing but science fiction. I loved William Gibson and I still do. But my favourite book when I was growing up, for a long time, was 'Snow Crash' by Neal Stephenson, which I must have read about a dozen times when I was a teenager.
Ned Beauman
I'm reasonably good at talking onstage, but actually holding court in a pub is all to do with power dynamics which I don't think has anything to do with fiction.
Ned Beauman
There are probably a couple of things I'd never write about until everyone I know is dead. And then there's other stuff which nobody would want to read a book about anyway.
Ned Beauman
I love sentences. I love characters. But most of all, perhaps, I love to work on plot, and that may be where my natural gifts lie, if I have any. I like to think hard about plots in TV shows and films.
Ned Beauman
I was always determined that one way or another I would force a book on the world, even if I had to resort to writing one about a tabby cat who solves mysteries.
Ned Beauman
I'm very finicky about when I'm in the right mood to write. So most days, I find some excuse not to do anything.
Ned Beauman
The simile has to match the tone of its surroundings and has to be like a little joke. Writing a simile that isn't funny on some level is quite hard.
Ned Beauman
I started my first novel when I was 10, and have produced thousands of pages of juvenilia since.
Ned Beauman