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Most of the time, I regard the judgment of people as a waste of time. I regard the judgment of behavior as imperative.
Nathaniel Branden
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Nathaniel Branden
Age: 84 †
Born: 1930
Born: April 9
Died: 2014
Died: December 3
Academic
Non-Fiction Writer
Psychologist
Psychotherapist
Judgment
Behavior
Time
People
Imperative
Imperatives
Regard
Waste
More quotes by Nathaniel Branden
Integrity is the integration of ideals, convictions, standards, beliefs-and behavior. When our behavior is congruent with our professed values, when ideals and practice match up, we have integrity.
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A bully hides his fears with fake bravado. That is the opposite of self-assertiveness.
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Your choices have psychological consequences. The way you choose to deal with reality, truth, facts - your choice to honor or dishonor your own perceptions - registers in your mind, for good or for bad, and either confirms and strengthens your self-esteem or undermines and weakens it.
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If my aim is to prove I am 'enough,' the project goes on to infinity-because the battle was already lost on the day I conceded the issue was debatable.
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The first step toward change is awareness. The second step is acceptance.
Nathaniel Branden
Integrity is congruence between what you know, what you profess, and what you do.
Nathaniel Branden
We tend to feel most comfortable, most at home, with people whose self esteem level resembles our own.
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Taking on responsibilities that properly belong to someone else means behaving irresponsibly toward yourself. You need to know where you end and someone else begins. You need to understand boundaries. You need to know what is and is not up to you, what is and is not in your control, what is and is not your responsibility.
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If we attach more importance to what other people believe than to what we know to be true - if we value belonging over being - we will not attain authenticity.
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Respect starts with ourselves.
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The practice of assertiveness: being authentic in our dealings with others treating our values and persons with decent respect in social contexts refusing to fake the reality of who we are or what we esteem in order to avoid disapproval the willingness to stand up for ourselves and our ideas in appropriate ways in appropriate contexts.
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Our motive is not to prove our self-worth, but to live up to our possibilities.
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Accepting does not necessarily mean liking, enjoying, condoning. I can accept what is-and be determined to evolve from there. It is not acceptance but denial that leaves me stuck.
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Force, governmental coercion, is the instrument by which the ethics of altruism - the belief that the individual exists to serve others - is translated into political reality.
Nathaniel Branden
Sometimes pain is easier to bear alone than happiness.
Nathaniel Branden
We are anxious when there is a dissonance between our knowledge and the perceivable facts. Since our knowledge is not to be doubted or questioned, it is the facts that have to be altered.
Nathaniel Branden
Doing more of what doesn't work doesn't work.
Nathaniel Branden
If we do have realistic confidence in our mind and value, if we feel secure within ourselves, we tend to experience the world as open to us and to respond appropriately to challenges and opportunities.
Nathaniel Branden
There is no value-judgment more important to a man--no factor more decisive in his psychological development and motivation--than the estimate he passes on himself.
Nathaniel Branden
It would be hard to name a more certain sign of poor self-esteem than the need to perceive some other group as inferior.
Nathaniel Branden