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A bully hides his fears with fake bravado. That is the opposite of self-assertiveness.

Nathaniel Branden

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Nathaniel Branden
Age: 84 †
Born: 1930
Born: April 9
Died: 2014
Died: December 3
Academic
Non-Fiction Writer
Psychologist
Psychotherapist
Self
Bravado
Assertive
Hides
Bully
Fake
Fears
Opposite
Opposites
Assertiveness

More quotes by Nathaniel Branden

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If we do not believe in ourselves- neither in our efficacy nor in our goodness- the universe is a frightening place.
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A goal without an action plan is a daydream.
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The practice of assertiveness: being authentic in our dealings with others treating our values and persons with decent respect in social contexts refusing to fake the reality of who we are or what we esteem in order to avoid disapproval the willingness to stand up for ourselves and our ideas in appropriate ways in appropriate contexts.
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Most of the time, I regard the judgment of people as a waste of time. I regard the judgment of behavior as imperative.
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Even when our life is most difficult, it is important to remember that something within us is keeping us alive- the life force-that lift us, energizes us, pulls us back sometimes from the abyss of despair. True spirituality does not exist without love of life.
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For I to become we and yet remain I, is one of the great challenges of marriage.
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If you overcome your fear to ask someone for a date, a raise, or help with a project, that is an act of self-assertiveness. You are moving out into life rather than contracting and withdrawing.
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Most of us are taught from an early age to pay far more attention to signals coming from other people than from within. We are encouraged to ignore our own needs and wants and to concentrate on living up to others expectations.
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Fear and pain should be treated as signals not to close our eyes but to open them wider.
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When we bury our feelings, we also bury ourselves. It means we exist in a state of alienation. We rarely know it, but we are lonely for ourselves.
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The first step toward change is awareness. The second step is acceptance.
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In any culture, subculture, or family in which belief is valued above thought, and self-surrender is valued above self-expression, and conformity is valued above integrity, those who preserve their self-esteem are likely to be heroic exceptions.
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An emotion is both a mental and a physical event.
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Where we see self esteem, we see self acceptance. High self esteem individual tend to avoid falling into an adversarial relationship with themselves.
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Of all the judgments we pass in life, none is more important than the judgment we pass on ourselves.
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High self esteem people can surely be knocked down by an excess of troubles, but they are quickerto pick themselves up again.
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Be careful what you say to your children. They may agree with you.
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For children mastery entails struggle. This means they must be permitted to struggle. If parents inappropriately step in to help-out of impatience or solicitude-they sabotage important learning. Among other things, the child is unlikely to discover the advantages of perseverance and self-discipline.
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To attain success without attaining positive self-esteem is to be condemned to feeling like an imposter anxiously awaiting exposure.
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The first love affair you must consummate is the love affair with yourself. Only then are you ready for a romantic relationship.
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