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There are Russian spies here now. And if we're lucky, they'll steal some of our secrets and they'll be two years behind.

Mort Sahl

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Mort Sahl
Age: 97
Born: 1927
Born: May 11
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Montreal
Quebec
Morton Lyon Sahl
Lucky
Behind
Spies
Secret
Spy
Two
Steal
Years
Russian
Secrets
Stealing
Behinds

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We would have broken up except for the children. Who were the children? Well, she and I were.
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A Yuppie is someone who believes it's courageous to eat in a restaurant that hasn't been reviewed yet.
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A conservative is someone who believes in reform. But not now.
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I never met a man I didn't like until I met Will Rogers.
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I found people looked better when they laughed
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Most people past college age are not atheists. It's too hard to be in society, for one thing. Because you don't get any days off. And if you're an agnostic you don't know whether you get them off or not.
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Women want their men to be cops. They want you to punish them and tell them what the limits are. The only thing that women hate worse from a man than being slapped is when you get on your knees and say you're sorry.
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I'm not a liberal, I'm a radical!
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Obama is running again for spite.
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Reagan won because he ran against Jimmy Carter. If he ran unopposed he would have lost.
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Obama said he went to Libya because of his conscience. Did anyone ever wrestle with his conscience and lose?
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We all know that America is the worst country in the world, except for all the others.
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Everything I tell you is true, but this is factual.
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I watched Ken Burns' Civil War series on PBS. My favorite segment is when Bob Hope entertains the troops at Gettysburg.
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That feeling of hopelessness only serves your masters.
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New book on Malcolm X says we don't know how he was killed. Want to bring in the FBI. Maybe they were in already.
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My whole life is a movie. It's just that there are no dissolves. I have to live every agonizing moment of it. My life needs editing.
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There's so much Botox around now that you can't tell when a Jewish girl is angry!
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I went to computer class with my Dell and I was bullied by a guy with a Mac.
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Liberals feel unworthy of their possessions. Conservatives feel they deserve everything they've stolen.
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