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Every time the Russians throw an American in jail, the Committee throws an American in jail to get even.

Mort Sahl

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Mort Sahl
Age: 97
Born: 1927
Born: May 11
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Montreal
Quebec
Morton Lyon Sahl
American
Even
Every
Throws
Time
Russians
Committee
Committees
Jail
Throw

More quotes by Mort Sahl

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The New York Times is the official leak of the State Department.
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If you can't join them, beat them.
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This matter of two sides to every question is bad logic and bad practice: sometimes there are no sides sometimes there are a hundred.
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I never met a man I didn't like until I met Will Rogers.
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A Yuppie is someone who believes it's courageous to eat in a restaurant that hasn't been reviewed yet.
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I went to computer class with my Dell and I was bullied by a guy with a Mac.
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Reagan won because he ran against Jimmy Carter. If he ran unopposed he would have lost.
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We all know that America is the worst country in the world, except for all the others.
Mort Sahl
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New book on Malcolm X says we don't know how he was killed. Want to bring in the FBI. Maybe they were in already.
Mort Sahl
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I watched Ken Burns' Civil War series on PBS. My favorite segment is when Bob Hope entertains the troops at Gettysburg.
Mort Sahl
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Will Rogers…used to come out with a newspaper and pretend he was a yokel criticizing the intellectuals who ran the government. I come out with a newspaper and pretend I’m an intellectual making fun of the yokels running the government.
Mort Sahl
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Most people past college age are not atheists. It's too hard to be in society, for one thing. Because you don't get any days off. And if you're an agnostic you don't know whether you get them off or not.
Mort Sahl
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That feeling of hopelessness only serves your masters.
Mort Sahl
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Everything I tell you is true, but this is factual.
Mort Sahl
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One thing about being narrow-minded: you'll never be lonely.
Mort Sahl
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I'm for capital punishment. You've got to execute people. How else are they going to learn?
Mort Sahl
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There are Russian spies here now. And if we're lucky, they'll steal some of our secrets and they'll be two years behind.
Mort Sahl
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If anybody comes up to you and says, My kid is a conservative - why is that? you say, Remember in the 60′s when we told you if you kept using drugs your kids would be mutants?
Mort Sahl
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Obama is running again for spite.
Mort Sahl
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In the forties, to get a girl you had to be a GI or a jock. In the fifties, to get a girl you had to be Jewish. In the sixties, to get a girl you had to be black. In the seventies, to get a girl you've got to be a girl.
Mort Sahl