Quote

I never met a man I didn't like until I met Will Rogers.

Mort Sahl

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Mort Sahl
Age: 97
Born: 1927
Born: May 11
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Montreal
Quebec
Morton Lyon Sahl
Gravestone
Tombstone
Roger
Mets
Didn
Never
Men
Like
Rogers

More quotes by Mort Sahl

Image
If someone were to ask me for a short cut to sensuality, I would suggest he go shopping for a used 427 Shelby-Cobra. But it is only fair to warn you that of the 300 guys who switched to them in 1966, only two went back to women.
Mort Sahl
Image
The New York Times is the official leak of the State Department.
Mort Sahl
Image
This matter of two sides to every question is bad logic and bad practice: sometimes there are no sides sometimes there are a hundred.
Mort Sahl
Image
In the forties, to get a girl you had to be a GI or a jock. In the fifties, to get a girl you had to be Jewish. In the sixties, to get a girl you had to be black. In the seventies, to get a girl you've got to be a girl.
Mort Sahl
Image
I'm for capital punishment. You've got to execute people. How else are they going to learn?
Mort Sahl
Image
You haven't lived until you've died in California
Mort Sahl
Image
Nixon's the kind of guy that if you were drowning fifty feet off shore, he'd throw you a thirty foot rope. Then Kissinger would go on TV the next night and say that the President had met you more than half-way.
Mort Sahl
Image
The distance between taking social action and having the knowledge is as wide as the mouth of the Mississippi.
Mort Sahl
Image
I watched Ken Burns' Civil War series on PBS. My favorite segment is when Bob Hope entertains the troops at Gettysburg.
Mort Sahl
Image
There were four million people in the American Colonies and we had Jefferson and Franklin. Now we have over 200 million and the two top guys are Clinton and Dole. What can you draw from this? Darwin was wrong.
Mort Sahl
Image
I found people looked better when they laughed
Mort Sahl
Image
I used to go out with actresses and other female impersonators.
Mort Sahl
Image
If anybody comes up to you and says, My kid is a conservative - why is that? you say, Remember in the 60′s when we told you if you kept using drugs your kids would be mutants?
Mort Sahl
Image
Obama says his recreation consists of reading the Constitution... looking for a loophole.
Mort Sahl
Image
Reagan won because he ran against Jimmy Carter. If he ran unopposed he would have lost.
Mort Sahl
Image
If you can't join them, beat them.
Mort Sahl
Image
Will Rogers…used to come out with a newspaper and pretend he was a yokel criticizing the intellectuals who ran the government. I come out with a newspaper and pretend I’m an intellectual making fun of the yokels running the government.
Mort Sahl
Image
Most people past college age are not atheists. It's too hard to be in society, for one thing. Because you don't get any days off. And if you're an agnostic you don't know whether you get them off or not.
Mort Sahl
Image
I don't think crucifixion is the answer. I believe in the resurrection. I like that part of the story.
Mort Sahl
Image
A Yuppie is someone who believes it's courageous to eat in a restaurant that hasn't been reviewed yet.
Mort Sahl