Quote

Remember that no matter how selfish, how cruel, how unfeeling you have been today, every time you take a breath, you make a flower happy.

Mort Sahl

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Mort Sahl
Age: 97
Born: 1927
Born: May 11
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Montreal
Quebec
Morton Lyon Sahl
Remember
Today
Unfeeling
Matter
Cruel
Take
Selfish
Every
Breath
Make
Breaths
Time
Flower
Happy

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I used to go out with actresses and other female impersonators.
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Obama is running again for spite.
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Will Rogers…used to come out with a newspaper and pretend he was a yokel criticizing the intellectuals who ran the government. I come out with a newspaper and pretend I’m an intellectual making fun of the yokels running the government.
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I don't think fascism is dying for.
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If you can't join them, beat them.
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One thing about being narrow-minded: you'll never be lonely.
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In the forties, to get a girl you had to be a GI or a jock. In the fifties, to get a girl you had to be Jewish. In the sixties, to get a girl you had to be black. In the seventies, to get a girl you've got to be a girl.
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I went to computer class with my Dell and I was bullied by a guy with a Mac.
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I don't think crucifixion is the answer. I believe in the resurrection. I like that part of the story.
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Everything I tell you is true, but this is factual.
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There were four million people in the American Colonies and we had Jefferson and Franklin. Now we have over 200 million and the two top guys are Clinton and Dole. What can you draw from this? Darwin was wrong.
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There's so much Botox around now that you can't tell when a Jewish girl is angry!
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A conservative is someone who believes in reform. But not now.
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I'm for capital punishment. You've got to execute people. How else are they going to learn?
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Nixon's the kind of guy that if you were drowning fifty feet off shore, he'd throw you a thirty foot rope. Then Kissinger would go on TV the next night and say that the President had met you more than half-way.
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I watched Ken Burns' Civil War series on PBS. My favorite segment is when Bob Hope entertains the troops at Gettysburg.
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A Yuppie is someone who believes it's courageous to eat in a restaurant that hasn't been reviewed yet.
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If anybody comes up to you and says, My kid is a conservative - why is that? you say, Remember in the 60′s when we told you if you kept using drugs your kids would be mutants?
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If you were the only person left on the planet, I would have to attack you. That's my job.
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That feeling of hopelessness only serves your masters.
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