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My whole life is a movie. It's just that there are no dissolves. I have to live every agonizing moment of it. My life needs editing.
Mort Sahl
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Mort Sahl
Age: 97
Born: 1927
Born: May 11
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Montreal
Quebec
Morton Lyon Sahl
Movie
Moment
Moments
Live
Whole
Needs
Dissolves
Every
Agonizing
Life
Editing
More quotes by Mort Sahl
We would have broken up except for the children. Who were the children? Well, she and I were.
Mort Sahl
If you can't join them, beat them.
Mort Sahl
This matter of two sides to every question is bad logic and bad practice: sometimes there are no sides sometimes there are a hundred.
Mort Sahl
Everything I tell you is true, but this is factual.
Mort Sahl
If someone were to ask me for a short cut to sensuality, I would suggest he go shopping for a used 427 Shelby-Cobra. But it is only fair to warn you that of the 300 guys who switched to them in 1966, only two went back to women.
Mort Sahl
If anybody comes up to you and says, My kid is a conservative - why is that? you say, Remember in the 60′s when we told you if you kept using drugs your kids would be mutants?
Mort Sahl
I don't believe in good people and bad people. I believe in the better parts of people.
Mort Sahl
I'm not a liberal, I'm a radical!
Mort Sahl
The distance between taking social action and having the knowledge is as wide as the mouth of the Mississippi.
Mort Sahl
There were four million people in the American Colonies and we had Jefferson and Franklin. Now we have over 200 million and the two top guys are Clinton and Dole. What can you draw from this? Darwin was wrong.
Mort Sahl
Remember that no matter how selfish, how cruel, how unfeeling you have been today, every time you take a breath, you make a flower happy.
Mort Sahl
New book on Malcolm X says we don't know how he was killed. Want to bring in the FBI. Maybe they were in already.
Mort Sahl
Obama is running again for spite.
Mort Sahl
Women want their men to be cops. They want you to punish them and tell them what the limits are. The only thing that women hate worse from a man than being slapped is when you get on your knees and say you're sorry.
Mort Sahl
The New York Times is the official leak of the State Department.
Mort Sahl
In the forties, to get a girl you had to be a GI or a jock. In the fifties, to get a girl you had to be Jewish. In the sixties, to get a girl you had to be black. In the seventies, to get a girl you've got to be a girl.
Mort Sahl
A Yuppie is someone who believes it's courageous to eat in a restaurant that hasn't been reviewed yet.
Mort Sahl
Reagan won because he ran against Jimmy Carter. If he ran unopposed he would have lost.
Mort Sahl
I never met a man I didn't like until I met Will Rogers.
Mort Sahl
Obama said he went to Libya because of his conscience. Did anyone ever wrestle with his conscience and lose?
Mort Sahl