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In the forties, to get a girl you had to be a GI or a jock. In the fifties, to get a girl you had to be Jewish. In the sixties, to get a girl you had to be black. In the seventies, to get a girl you've got to be a girl.
Mort Sahl
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Mort Sahl
Age: 97
Born: 1927
Born: May 11
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Montreal
Quebec
Morton Lyon Sahl
Sixties
Seventies
Sixty
Jewish
Gis
Forty
Jock
Sex
Forties
Girl
Jocks
Black
Fifties
More quotes by Mort Sahl
If you were the only person left on the planet, I would have to attack you. That's my job.
Mort Sahl
There are Russian spies here now. And if we're lucky, they'll steal some of our secrets and they'll be two years behind.
Mort Sahl
If you can't join them, beat them.
Mort Sahl
Reagan won because he ran against Jimmy Carter. If he ran unopposed he would have lost.
Mort Sahl
I don't think fascism is dying for.
Mort Sahl
If anybody comes up to you and says, My kid is a conservative - why is that? you say, Remember in the 60′s when we told you if you kept using drugs your kids would be mutants?
Mort Sahl
Obama is running again for spite.
Mort Sahl
Will Rogers…used to come out with a newspaper and pretend he was a yokel criticizing the intellectuals who ran the government. I come out with a newspaper and pretend I’m an intellectual making fun of the yokels running the government.
Mort Sahl
I found people looked better when they laughed
Mort Sahl
That feeling of hopelessness only serves your masters.
Mort Sahl
Women want their men to be cops. They want you to punish them and tell them what the limits are. The only thing that women hate worse from a man than being slapped is when you get on your knees and say you're sorry.
Mort Sahl
Every time the Russians throw an American in jail, the Committee throws an American in jail to get even.
Mort Sahl
Obama says his recreation consists of reading the Constitution... looking for a loophole.
Mort Sahl
I don't believe in good people and bad people. I believe in the better parts of people.
Mort Sahl
One thing about being narrow-minded: you'll never be lonely.
Mort Sahl
There's a danger our fiscal bankruptcy might overtake our moral bankruptcy.
Mort Sahl
Obama said he went to Libya because of his conscience. Did anyone ever wrestle with his conscience and lose?
Mort Sahl
Most people past college age are not atheists. It's too hard to be in society, for one thing. Because you don't get any days off. And if you're an agnostic you don't know whether you get them off or not.
Mort Sahl
If someone were to ask me for a short cut to sensuality, I would suggest he go shopping for a used 427 Shelby-Cobra. But it is only fair to warn you that of the 300 guys who switched to them in 1966, only two went back to women.
Mort Sahl
The New York Times is the official leak of the State Department.
Mort Sahl