Quote

In the forties, to get a girl you had to be a GI or a jock. In the fifties, to get a girl you had to be Jewish. In the sixties, to get a girl you had to be black. In the seventies, to get a girl you've got to be a girl.

Mort Sahl

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Mort Sahl
Age: 97
Born: 1927
Born: May 11
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Montreal
Quebec
Morton Lyon Sahl
Black
Fifties
Sixties
Seventies
Sixty
Jewish
Gis
Forty
Jock
Sex
Forties
Girl
Jocks

More quotes by Mort Sahl

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I watched Ken Burns' Civil War series on PBS. My favorite segment is when Bob Hope entertains the troops at Gettysburg.
Mort Sahl
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This matter of two sides to every question is bad logic and bad practice: sometimes there are no sides sometimes there are a hundred.
Mort Sahl
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That feeling of hopelessness only serves your masters.
Mort Sahl
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There's so much Botox around now that you can't tell when a Jewish girl is angry!
Mort Sahl
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If anybody comes up to you and says, My kid is a conservative - why is that? you say, Remember in the 60′s when we told you if you kept using drugs your kids would be mutants?
Mort Sahl
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New book on Malcolm X says we don't know how he was killed. Want to bring in the FBI. Maybe they were in already.
Mort Sahl
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If you can't join them, beat them.
Mort Sahl
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Will Rogers…used to come out with a newspaper and pretend he was a yokel criticizing the intellectuals who ran the government. I come out with a newspaper and pretend I’m an intellectual making fun of the yokels running the government.
Mort Sahl
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Nixon's the kind of guy that if you were drowning fifty feet off shore, he'd throw you a thirty foot rope. Then Kissinger would go on TV the next night and say that the President had met you more than half-way.
Mort Sahl
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I don't think crucifixion is the answer. I believe in the resurrection. I like that part of the story.
Mort Sahl
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We all know that America is the worst country in the world, except for all the others.
Mort Sahl
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Most people past college age are not atheists. It's too hard to be in society, for one thing. Because you don't get any days off. And if you're an agnostic you don't know whether you get them off or not.
Mort Sahl
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Obama says his recreation consists of reading the Constitution... looking for a loophole.
Mort Sahl
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If you were the only person left on the planet, I would have to attack you. That's my job.
Mort Sahl
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Every time the Russians throw an American in jail, the Committee throws an American in jail to get even.
Mort Sahl
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I used to go out with actresses and other female impersonators.
Mort Sahl
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A conservative is someone who believes in reform. But not now.
Mort Sahl
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A Yuppie is someone who believes it's courageous to eat in a restaurant that hasn't been reviewed yet.
Mort Sahl
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The distance between taking social action and having the knowledge is as wide as the mouth of the Mississippi.
Mort Sahl
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The New York Times is the official leak of the State Department.
Mort Sahl