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Will Rogers…used to come out with a newspaper and pretend he was a yokel criticizing the intellectuals who ran the government. I come out with a newspaper and pretend I’m an intellectual making fun of the yokels running the government.
Mort Sahl
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Mort Sahl
Age: 97
Born: 1927
Born: May 11
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Montreal
Quebec
Morton Lyon Sahl
Fun
Intellectuals
Making
Roger
Running
Newspaper
Used
Ran
Government
Criticize
Come
Pretend
Newspapers
Rogers
Intellectual
Criticizing
More quotes by Mort Sahl
I'm for capital punishment. You've got to execute people. How else are they going to learn?
Mort Sahl
Liberals feel unworthy of their possessions. Conservatives feel they deserve everything they've stolen.
Mort Sahl
Nixon's the kind of guy that if you were drowning fifty feet off shore, he'd throw you a thirty foot rope. Then Kissinger would go on TV the next night and say that the President had met you more than half-way.
Mort Sahl
There are Russian spies here now. And if we're lucky, they'll steal some of our secrets and they'll be two years behind.
Mort Sahl
I don't think crucifixion is the answer. I believe in the resurrection. I like that part of the story.
Mort Sahl
Obama said he went to Libya because of his conscience. Did anyone ever wrestle with his conscience and lose?
Mort Sahl
Obama says his recreation consists of reading the Constitution... looking for a loophole.
Mort Sahl
I never met a man I didn't like until I met Will Rogers.
Mort Sahl
If you can't join them, beat them.
Mort Sahl
I went to computer class with my Dell and I was bullied by a guy with a Mac.
Mort Sahl
This matter of two sides to every question is bad logic and bad practice: sometimes there are no sides sometimes there are a hundred.
Mort Sahl
One thing about being narrow-minded: you'll never be lonely.
Mort Sahl
The New York Times is the official leak of the State Department.
Mort Sahl
I'm not a liberal, I'm a radical!
Mort Sahl
Most people past college age are not atheists. It's too hard to be in society, for one thing. Because you don't get any days off. And if you're an agnostic you don't know whether you get them off or not.
Mort Sahl
In the forties, to get a girl you had to be a GI or a jock. In the fifties, to get a girl you had to be Jewish. In the sixties, to get a girl you had to be black. In the seventies, to get a girl you've got to be a girl.
Mort Sahl
I used to go out with actresses and other female impersonators.
Mort Sahl
If you were the only person left on the planet, I would have to attack you. That's my job.
Mort Sahl
We all know that America is the worst country in the world, except for all the others.
Mort Sahl
A conservative is someone who believes in reform. But not now.
Mort Sahl
